my authentic blend of 23 flavors

hairpocolypse

2012-01-25T21:31:00.002-07:00

and to think, i used to be afraid of the zombie apocolypse. who knew that a hair cut could be so devastating?

surely not me. i had hair almost to my boobs when i went in on saturday. i was ok with going about 3 inches shorter - same style, just cleaned up and thinned out a bit. i walked out in shock, not wanting to realize what had just happened to me. [i won't compare my haircut to date rape, because i'm not that trivial... but almost.]

she butchered me. she layered up the back so crazy like & short. incredibly short. like the layers started at eye level short. remember - i had long hair when i went in there. the back was left in a messy, oddly drastic a-line cut that stopped when it got to the sides. the sides - she left completely unblended. and uneven. and blunt.

when i left, the first thing i did was put my hair up in a pony tail. cause i wanted to hide from the monster, maybe. sunday, i tried doing my hair for church & it was bad. reality was starting to set in. i tried to wear it wavy like normal & when i saw myself later in the mirror, i was horrified. horrified that people saw me at church and probably thought, "honey - you left the house like that? have you no shame?" it was bad.

this length surely doesn't flatter my chubby little face. in fact, i think it made it worse. who wants a haircut that makes your face look even fatter? awesome. so good for the self esteem, right?

monday i was hating life. i hated my hair. i hated that it took me the whole time mikey was napping to get it done. gone are the days of a quick shower and get dressed session. back are the days of sweating out a blow dry & flat iron session. its fun to have underboob sweat, right? i keep telling myself this.

tuesday, i was starting to feel depressed. every time i looked in the mirror, i thought the meanest and ugliest thoughts about myself. i know i can be hard on myself, self-deprecating. amplify it by 100. [add to the mess a lovely setting of no less than 5 huge, painful zits that i was getting. hormone much?] i got fed up. i called the salon. it is an aveda salon. i decided that nice, passive hayley had to shut the hell up & stand up for her self.

i explained to the lady that answered that i had a butch job done and that i wanted it fixed. i no longer want to look like florence henderson in the back with dog ears in front. she giggled and set me up to get fixed tonight.

the girl that fixed me - she's not 12, she's my age in fact - she sat me down and we talked about it. when i asked for a little validation, she agreed - horrible. and she said that that was being professional. she apologized and told me that in order to fix it, she was going to have to go even a little bit shorter, but that she'd try her hardest to leave length. and fix it she did. i left there tonight satisfied with the haircut that i now have. i may not be happy about it, but at least i don't feel absolutely ridiculous now.

so i may not be able to pull it up into a pony tail anymore. its that short. and i may have to spend my whole time that mikey's napping doing it... but at least i am not a shame to myself when i walk out of my bathroom anymore. well, there is still the fat girl with boob sweat issue - but i'm working on that, too.

i'll even go back to this new girl. megan. but i warned her that i'll be growing it out and to not expect me back in right away. she said i was welcome. she fixed it & i appreciate it. she even sent me home with a bottle of hair product. that made momma happy.

don't ask for pictures. none were taken. even i don't hate myself that much. i seriously wanted to cry.

snapshots from a first haircut

2012-01-21T16:04:00.001-07:00

the before - getting a feel for the car. he thought he was so cool!

it took a good 10 minutes before he was done, i have to say that i was really impressed with how well he did.

you know that the video is currently loading to youtube. :) yeah, we're those parents.

my weekend in chicago

2012-01-18T11:21:00.000-07:00

remember when i was having a sappy, sentimental moment about my dad? all of that was true. i only let out one little bit. when i said, "i wish i could be there" - i was trickin' you. i was going to be there. all of us were. in fact, there was never a time we weren't going to be there, pending flight cancellations that we were threatened with thursday night. as soon as my dad announced he was retiring, we all got to planning a trip home. we were all so excited. we knew we were going to knock his socks off. and boy did we ever. but i'll get to that part in a little bit.

heather arrived first, heidi & i flew in a little less than an hour later and we all headed towards the sears tower. my mom was downtown having lunch with my dad on his last day, which is kind of a funny story in and of itself and they weren't back yet, so we ran around the corner and grabbed some deep dish pizza for lunch. nothing like chicago pizza [and food, in general!] and boy did we get plenty over the weekend. i could do a whole post about the food alone. while we were at lunch, holly landed and started her trek to the sears. my mom's security got a little mixed up so my dad left her down in the lobby as we waited for that to get worked out. finally, she was up and we met holly in the lobby of the sear's tower. we had to get security passes and get through security and by the time we were getting to the elevator banks, a lady from my dad's office came down to meet us and show us where we were supposed to go. all of a sudden, my parents step off the elevator and rounded turned in the opposite direction of where we were standing or else the surprise would've happened right then and there. we all freaked out because we almost got caught. the lady, kim told us that they were headed over to the other elevator banks and that we'd be fine, so we relaxed a little.

all of a sudden, i was staring at my dad though, as they rounded the corner again. he gave me the most confused look i have ever gotten from him. heather and i were standing right there, there was no avoiding it, he walked right upon us. he later said that he recognized kim but that he didn't know who i was. the first words out of his mouth were "you're not supposed to be here." he was in shock. he just couldn't place us there. it was really quite funny. finally heather started yelling "surprise! surprise!" and we all caught on to what was happening. we definitely surprised him!

the work party was pretty amazing. big wigs from united came and talked about what a guy he is. his hard work, his dedication, his abilities, his heart & sense of humor. all things we all know, but love to hear. he got awards and presents. stories shared that we all laughed through. his boss had flowers for my mom and us girls, which was incredibly thoughtful. [she was the only person in on the secret, my mom needed her to help us with security and just to help work out the kinks of the details. she really came through on her end, too.]

after the party, we headed over to a greek restaurant with a bunch of my dad's friends who came into the city for his party. it was an adventure to get there but the food was delicious and it was nice to warm up. we eventually got on the metra and headed home.

saturday we grocery shopped and got the house ready for my mom's party on saturday night. it was a hopping party, too. lots and lots of my dad's old work friends and old family friends came. it was so much fun to visit with everyone. the food was delicious, too. it took all 6 of us to keep people greeted, coats put away and entertained - it was crazy.

sunday was our day to relax and just enjoy being together. [not that we hadn't been enjoying all along.] the girls out voted my parents and we said, "sorry but no church & we're going sinning." we had shopping and more food we wanted to enjoy. we hit woodfield and lou malnati's. it was such a fun day. i loved being with my parents and my sisters. we haven't all been together since mikey's blessing. and i don't think we've ever been just the "core" family since heidi left for college. it was a treat. we never once went to bed before midnight. it was surely not a weekend for sleep!

the only hard part of the weekend for me was leaving my boys. i hadn't left mikey before. the last few days up until i left were hard. everytime mikey was sweet or cute, i'd break down and think, "i can't leave him!" but i knew i had to. i survived with only a few minutes while i was gone where i cried. thank heavens garrett was so good to me, sending me pictures and videos of their weekend. i watched and rewatched them almost constantly. i knew all along that mikey would be fine - he'd be with his dad. i knew garrett would be fine, he's a pro. i just didn't know if i'd be fine, but i was ok.

all in all, it was an amazing weekend. i'm so glad i was able to go and be a part of my dad's last day of work. i'm so thankful for united and for the life we've had because of it. i'm excited to see what this next chapter in life brings for him - i expect him out here for a few days with us no later than march. [dad, i'm not joking about that part.] i loved getting to spend time with my parents and sisters. we definitely made memories!

what he says @ 16 months

2012-01-11T11:31:00.000-07:00

things mikey says:

knuck & knuckle. very clearly.
knock.
geez.
bite?
hi!
tree [he loved having the christmas tree up. but now he says it about all trees.]
whoa? [short for "hello" for someone who can't say his l's.']
bye!
da-da & ma-ma
tay-too [thank you]
gog [dog]
lots of animal sounds. baa, moo, ruff, ssssss [hiss for a snake] & rar! [all animals are still called a gog though.]
fuf [fan]
sues. [shoes]
uh-oh
no. no-no. no! no!
mmmm-mhmmm-mmmm if he spies some food that he wants.
and for all other things, he still does his little chirpy grunt like a charm. "ouh" & he will grab your hands and take you where he wants you to be, like to the fruit bowl if he wants a piece of fruit.

i love hearing his voice. music to my ears.

my 2011 instagram blurb book = absolute love!

2012-01-11T11:22:00.000-07:00

i didn't really get serious about using instagram until about summer but i was doing mikey's first year on project life through that time, so our life was documented. the second half of the year - we used and abused instagram. i love that app. seriously my favorite of all of the apps in town. well, the last part of december, i got to thinking about how fun it would be to make a photo book of all of the pictures we'd taken. so new years day, i whipped this little bad boy up & it was delivered today. i am totally and completely in love. it is a good quality [well, not all of the pictures are that great, but that is the photographer's fault, not the book's fault. and i knew that when i was making it. but i still used the pictures because they still mean something. who cares if they're a little blurry, that happens with moving children, right? right.] and i can't wait to share. if i may say so myself, this little idea i had - genius. i highly recommend. it inspired my plans for this year's project life. instagram + digital project life on shutterfly. i'm lovin' it. [and now i'm craving mcdonalds french fries...]

june 18, 1965

2012-01-10T10:55:00.000-07:00

my dad just sent an email to his family telling us that there is little more than 3 days left before he retires from you united airlines. he's worked there for over 46 years. we grew up airline brats with an amazing senority date. we were so blessed in that we could travel to see our family that we were far away from. we went places & saw things. mind you, we surely weren't rich - but in so many ways we were. not many kids got to go to paris, australia, london, or alaska. and surely they didn't get to jet set off to california or utah any weekend they wanted to. i used to be able to walk up and down the concourses of an airport and be able to tell you what every single airplane was. i spent so many ~~hours~~ days in airports trying to get somewhere. my dad would take us for walks to the bathroom, or just up and down the concourse so we wouldn't all go crazy. none of this is important, other than you should know that i can't see an airplane, let alone be in an airport, without thinking of my dad. without feeling a sense of pride in what he has done. he worked hard for his family and we had an amazing childhood & life.

i responded to his email and got an autoresponse back. not an out of office, but redirecting people who need him professionally & personally. i don't know why, but it made me cry. the ugly cry. don't get me wrong, i'm so excited for him to retire. i have big plans of talking him into little trips out here to visit and spend a few days with us. he's retiring with honor & everyone knows it. but it is the end of a very grand era & apparently i'm more sentimental than i want to be.

i've always loved that he started working the day after he graduated from high school and never quit. i loved that united took my parents from california to chicago a long time ago & that they stayed. chicago was a great home. and while i hope they don't stay there forever - we'll face that change when we need [or get] to. there are parties being thrown this weekend. i so wish i could go. i know they will be good, though. i hope they're special for him. i hope people do it up right for him, let him know he's appreciated and loved. i know he is, i just hope he knows it. people that know my dad have nothing but good things to say about him. people that know him and have been able to work with him have been nothing but lucky.and blessed. i know that's how i feel, since i was one of 4 that was lucky enough to call him "dad".

thank you, united. more importantly, thank you dad. you done good.

post bath spazzing out

2012-01-09T19:28:00.002-07:00

just in case you forgot about mikey's youtube channel, here's a fun reminder.

tres cosas

2012-01-06T14:27:00.002-07:00

[three things a la espanol]

i've been doing the shred this week, every morning. i know for lots of you out there, that's nothing. but for me, since i haven't really done any exercise since the beginning of november, this is big for me. i'm starting another round of "feeling great in 8" in 2 weeks. i wanted to give myself a headstart. not being totally strict about eating, but at least getting back into the routine of exercise. and surely being better about eating than i was during the holidays. well between tuesday and this morning [friday!!!] i gained 8 pounds. i spent a large part of the morning being really irritated. pissed, even. i may or may not have called myself jabba the hutt. but i've decided that isn't going to get me anywhere. i'll just keep doing it. eating better. exercising. all that bull. it'll start showing at some point, right? sometimes it is hard to stay motivated, which is so frustrating because on tuesday morning - i was so gung ho.
for christmas, mikey got this toy called the alphaberry. he loves it. i think it is so clever and cute, too. he sits and listens to music on it & pushes his letters. he also holds it up to his ear and pretends like it is his phone. i got some pictures of him playing today.
here's a little collage i made, in an effort to keep up with being better about taking pictures. on a real camera. cause while i might be jabba, i can at least be better about something that i want to do better at right now. i just love his face. just don't mind that his face is dirty.

what the sheet?

2012-01-04T19:27:00.005-07:00

mikey woke up from his nap today [we had a jammie day... no shame!] and i was in the middle of doing something, so he sat in there for a few minutes before i got to him. when i went in, this is what i found. yep, that is the sheet off of his bed. every blanket and stuffed animal was thrown out - that's normal. i think the sheet was about to go. he's so crazy. he was also jumping/bouncing & so proud of himself when i went in there. garrett grabbed the camera and snapped a few.

tonight, as garrett was bathing mikey, i knew i wanted to put this picture on my blog. i went to get pictures off of the camera and... gulp... i had no pictures on there from december. the only pictures i took in december were on my phone. [insert overwhelming amounts of guilt.]

i knew i'd been neglecting, but i didn't realize it was that bad. thank heavens, i pulled my head out of my butt and started doing project life again. the break was nice, i'll admit... but i want to document my child's life [& our family] better. i've got the blog up and going again if you're interested. i'm doing pictures from instagram this time. i have been posting the pictures on facebook, but that isn't a guarantee.

p.s. i'm doing digital project life - clementine edition, [obvs] this time around. i think it'll be a lot easier or less time. but less journaling. hence the necessity of the blog. i'm loving it so far!!!

and future mikey - i'm sorry for the last 2 months' neglect. we played like crazy kid. we really did. you walked backwards. the floor was always a mess. you knocked. it was good times.

books read in 2011

2012-01-01T09:46:00.000-07:00

1. Cutting For Stone by Abraham Verghese ****
2. Kindred by Octavia Butler ***
3. Love, Lust & Faking It by Jenny McCarthy **
4. Milkweed by Jerry Spinelli **
5. Wicked Girls by Stephanie Hemphill **
6. A Lucky Child by Thomas Buergenthal ****
7. Decoded by Jay-Z **
8. House Rules by Jodi Picoult ***
9. Matched by Ally Condie ****
10. Pioneer Woman Black Heels to Tracker Wheels by Ree Drummond ***
11. The Chosen One by Carol Lynch Williams ***
12. The Wednesday Wars by Gary Schmidt ***
13. Daughter of the Forest by Juliet Marillier ***
14. The Actor and The Housewife by Shannon Hale ***
15. Clara and Mr. Tiffany by Susan Vreeland ***
16. Bumped by Megan McCafferty ***
17. Stories I Only Tell My Friends by Rob Lowe ***
18. I am the Messenger by Markus Zusak *****
19. Bossypants by Tina Fey ****
20. Everlost by Neal Shusterman ***
21. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling *****
22. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J.K. Rowling *****
23. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling *****
24: A Stolen Life by Jaycee Dugard ***
25. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling *****
26. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling *****
27. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling *****
28. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling *****
29. The Underdog by Markus Zusak **
30. Fighting Ruben Wolfe by Markus Zusak **
31. Getting the Girl by Markus Zusak **
32. Rules of Civility by Amor Towles ****
33. Room by Emma Donoghue ****
34. Divergent by Veronica Roth ****
35. Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs **
36. The Kitchen House by Kathleen Grissom *****
37. Seriously... I'm Kidding by Ellen DeGeneres **
38. Letters in the Jade Dragon Box by Gale Sears *
39. Crossed b y Ally Condie ****

like in years past, i am going to re-rate them based on my memory of them today. they might be different from the rating i gave them on goodreads. i'm ok with that. if you're not, tough. :)

looking back, aside from re-reading favorites like harry potter, i'd have to say that my top 3 favorite books from 2011 were: the kitchen house, rules of civility, and cutting for stone. if i had a fourth, i'd say a lucky child. my top three youth fiction: divergent, matched [and crossed, which is #2] and i am the messenger.

here are links to other years: 2010, 2009

happy new year!!!

christmas 2011

2011-12-30T09:20:00.001-07:00

a few days after christmas, i kinda had a feeling in the pit of my stomach of guilt. i realized that the only pictures taken on christmas were instagram pictures on my phone. i used to have the camera out all of the time but now that project life is over, i've totally slacked.

let me just tell you a little background on the tales of my christmas past: they were magic. we did not grow up with any family around, so we were always alone on christmas. not alone, it was never lonely - just our small, immediate family. a mom and dad & their daughters. we had traditions galore & it was a delightful few days [because we all know that christmas lasted from the eve's eve til the day or two after christmas] of staying in and being together around the fireplace and christmas tree. the most contact we had with the outside world was a telephone call, except for the day after christmas, my mom usually ran out to hit the sales for a few hours... none of us complained. we played games, we ate, we stayed in the living room enjoying every last minute we could soak in. do you remember the anticipation? geez, i still get all excited when i think about these memories. we read scriptures, we listened to tapes of christmases past, [my parents used to tape record christmas morning. it was a lovely tradition & what a treasure to be able to go back and hear yourself when you were tiny.] we baked goodies, we had fancy dinners, we cuddled. we got up at ridiculous hours after having all slept in the same room. we jingle belled my parents awake on christmas morning... ahhhhh, you should hear my happy sighs right now.

i was talking to a friend this last week who i've known since i was in diapers. we were talking about christmas as a kid and she even commented on how incredible my family christmases were. she remembered hearing about them.

i want to create the same kind of magic for my kids. right now, mikey is too young to get it. but in a few years, he'll get it. garrett and i talked about the things we want to make tradition... and part of being married is compromising... when garrett and i first got married and he told me that on christmas they always traveled to see grandparents, i couldn't comprehend. i couldn't imagine spending christmas day in the car traveling around. so we negotiated... we'll spend most christmas eve's with garrett's family at his parents house - they have some pretty great christmas eve traditions. and then we'll spend christmas day at home with our own little family [though visitors are more than welcome!] and i'll cook another tasty meal christmas night. this way we're both satisfied... spending time with extended family & time at home. and so far, i love it. i loved spending the afternoon with garrett's family and doing their nativity play. it is funny [probably because i couldn't imagine enjoying different traditions before i got married] but i enjoy these new traditions, too - even if i want to hold on to some oldies still. the bottom line is: we just need to establish our own christmas traditions.

one tradition that we didn't hold to this year: getting up early. well, i did, so thus garrett did. but mikey didn't & as crazy as i am - i wouldn't wake him up, even on christmas morning. so when he slept in until almost 8 am, i was going nutters. i had showered and gotten ready for the day. [which ended up paying off as we eventually had church to get to & with unwrapping presents taking a chunk of time, it wouldn't have happened had i not been ready.]

in the end, santa came & we enjoyed going to sacrament on christmas. we went with heidi's family and i cried as i watched annie sing. at first i was a little bitter that we had to disrupt tradition and go to church. then i got a handle on it & remembered "the real reason for the season" [yes, i'm being sarcastic here, but at the same time it is true.] [i hate when people say "keep CHRIST in CHRISTmas.] and now, just so you don't think i'm purely the devil, i'm going to share a few christmas pictures with you:

playing with new toys.

i finally got a nativity! i love it!

this was the christmas of facetiming my family. it made me feel like we were with them, even when we were hours and states apart. i love facetime!

2011-12-19T19:59:00.001-07:00

mikey has started sleeping in later now that he's not napping in the afternoons. there have been a few mornings where we wake up before he does.

saturday morning, we were laying in bed talking and mikey started to stir. garrett was either reading his book or getting his morning update on his phone. but i started taunting him about going to get mikey before he did. sometimes we race. yes, we are that kind of dork nugget. he wasn't taking the bait of the taunts. so finally, as i was getting up, i said, "you're kind of making this boring."

all of a sudden, he sprang at me and growled, "i'm going to clobber you!" and tried to beat me out of the room. well, he very nearly did because i was laughing so hard.

i love that man. i love how he can ignore me when i'm being ridiculous and how he can feed into my silliness when it is appropriate, too. i'm so glad we have so much fun. i don't think everyone has it as good as we do.

i'm thrilled that he now has 2 weeks off of work and that we get to spend every day together, playing. we're going to watch shows [arrested development marathon already underway] and play wii games - most of these are after mikey goes to bed - and play with our little boy. i love it, just having a lot of family time, our little family and both sides of our families. i'm looking very forward to it all.

i got mikey out of his bed. and then he immediately wanted his dad. can you blame him? and garrett changed his poopy diaper. boo-yah.

15 month old mikey

2011-12-15T19:13:00.003-07:00

well. my picture taking has definitely slowed down & i do feel guilty about that. but honestly i feel like i'm down rolling around with him more, so i don't feel guilty about that.

i love this stage he's in. we are back to having so much fun. we're all healthy again. november was a very rough month for mikey and me. he is a funny eater. if we "cold" offer something to him, he might refuse it. for instance, he doesn't really love being put in his high chair to eat while i'm making dinner, but he will gladly sit on one of our laps when we sit down and eat pretty much everything we have on our plates. trick is, he has to see us eating it. then he wants it. from fudge to broccoli. i guess this is a test of our parenting because if he sees us doing it... i know the sitting on our laps to eat and not in his high chair isn't the best habit, but i can proudly say that i think it is our only "bad" one.

mikey is really into looking at pictures of animals and discussing their sounds. so far he can do: dogs, cows, sheep, snakes and lions regularly. there are a few more that he'll sometimes do. his roar is the absolute cutest thing in the world. my sister just gave us this poster that we just hung up out here was an instant hit. we have spent lots of time sitting and talking about those animals. then the abc poster from his room, it is like he all of a sudden realized it is there. he LOVES talking about animals during a diaper change and afterwards, too. it is pretty much expected that he'll get to spend a few minutes there after a dipe change & if you forget it, you might get in some trouble.

his two drawers in the kitchen are still probably his favorite play area. he loves to carry around a 1/2 teaspoon and mixing cup and stir. if you're lucky, he'll offer to share some with you. it makes him smile so big when you take a sip. i wonder what he thinks he's making... i love that he's already starting to pretend a little. if he can squeeze into the fridge when the door is open, he will. i love watching him butt the door back open. it cracks me up.

mikey loves spending time with kids. this week, i had my neice and nephew over for a sleepover. they're much bigger than him but they indulged him plenty. annie especially got roped into pushing him fast on his little bike/walker/thingy. he doesn't have the words to say, "come on, again!" or "please, keep doing this!" but he gets his message across with little grunts and groans. she got so sick of doing it that at one point she hid the bike & i didn't blame her. i just think he's a kid that would've done so well with older siblings. he can just sit and watch and be thrilled. and when they are nice back to him - oh heaven on earth for him!

mikey tells on himself when he's doing things he shouldn't be doing because he says "no, no!" as he's doing it. he's actually pretty good about not doing things, but probably once a day, he gets into the a little trouble with the ornaments. he just needs to be reminded it seems... because for the most part he will just look, but sometimes he can't resist temptation.

while mikey was sick, he had nasty diarrhea. and the world's worst diaper rash. at least that i've ever seen. it got worse because one night, he slept all night on an acid poop. which basically ate his little bottom right up. you can not imagine the guilt i had, because i heard him pooping [grunting] on the monitor but didn't do anything. i let him cry it out that night... i told myself that he was just waking up and needed to remember how to go back to sleep. well, during the last month - we've all kind of slipped into bad habits. ok. garrett and mikey have, because to be honest - mikey wants garrett when he wakes up in the night, so i've stopped going in. [isn't garrett the best daddy ever?] mikey has started waking up between 9 & 11 most nights and garrett will go in and rock him back to sleep, with the excuse of making sure he hasn't pooped. mikey is really milking the system, let me tell you. at first we were doing it because he was having horrible diarrhea all night long and couldn't sit or sleep on it. but it has been a week or two since he's pooped in the night & we need to stop going in. as garrett was spending a half hour in there with mikey last night, i was reading my toddler 411 book & realized that we'd reverted. so mikey, i'm sorry - but it is going to be tough love again. you need to remember to sleep like the good boy that you've always been...

yesterday i had a major burst of love for mikey. he gave me a kiss. and then snuggled me & i had this overwhelming gratitude for my life. i love that i get to stay home with him. i love that we get to play all day. i'm so thankful that garrett lets me stay home with him. he is a crazy fun, talkative little toddler all of a sudden and i love it. i loved babyhood. i still think he is a baby... but he is becoming a toddler so fast. and it is great fun.

if you frequent target...

2011-12-13T18:18:00.003-07:00

you need to know this: get the target red debit card.

here's some helpful hints:

it is not a new line of credit. it links to your debit card. you use it instead of your debit card.
you'll only get to use it at target.
you'll need a blank check when you go in to sign up for it.
you get 5% off everything.
it gives you free shipping on target.com
if you use target as your pharmacy, when you fill 5 prescriptions there, they'll send you a card in the mail that'll give you an additional 5% off for any purchases you make in one day. so you could do one grand shopping spree or you could go back in like 5 times. that's right friends, that is a total of 10% off for a day.

here's what i'm finding:

target employees are pushing it, i think they get some sort of credit for signing people up. i had one guy explain to me that they're doing it because it saves target from having to pay fees when they run our cards. thus, saving everyone. i am down with that.
people checking out automatically assume it is a credit card they're being offered & so then they say "no, thank you."
everytime i hear the person in front of me turning down an offer, i butt in and explain why they might want to re-think the matter, they end up getting it. [am i neddie jr, or what? huzzah!]
that is right, i may not be able to give everyone a christmas present this year, but i can spread my christmas cheer with savings. you're welcome, near perfect strangers.
some restrictions apply. [not really, i just wanted to say that.]
just get the damn card, please.

this is not a sponsored post. heavens, i wish it was. i still have plenty of shopping left to do. just don't forget your blank check! and don't make me tell you again.

the real december calendar

2011-12-01T14:59:00.001-07:00

a few months ago, garrett and i started using google calendar to keep ourselves up to date. we have a lovely calendar hanging on the wall & i still refer to that often - but it doesn't have the daily items on it. i have loved having emails in the morning waiting for me to remind me of an event for the day. i have also loved the "reminders" feature that will send me another little pop up window on my computer and phone as the event comes closer, should i set that up.

but the real calendar i'm talking about right now is the menu planner december calendar i printed. [found here...] on it, i included a lot of the evening activities for the month, so that i could keep it in mind when plotting treats.

i had been thinking about doing it this way in an effort to not have too much crap to do on christmas eve and day, over filling the fridge and then letting a bunch of food go to waste. i want my gluttony to be better spread out. and don't worry, we'll have lots to enjoy on christmas, but i won't feel the pressure to cram it all in.

not everything is a batch of cookies, in fact - i'm only making one batch per week. lots of the treats are our favorites that we've enjoyed making over the few years of our marriage. some are newbies that i want to try. many are appetizers. [we are suckers for appetizers at our house.] some desserts. some drinks. some breakfast items. [garrett has 2 weeks off this month. i can't wait. i know of a little boy who, while he can't anticipate it, will be in HOGS HEAVEN!] some treat days overlap with something i need to take - like the treat i make for bookclub will also serve as the day's treat... i'll make enough so that garrett gets to enjoy plenty, have no fear.

it is a good thing that my back is finally feeling better. because i will need to be doing my exercises everyday to keep from gaining too much weight.

bring on december, i can't wait!!!

monday morning update:

2011-11-28T06:49:00.001-07:00

mikey's bottom... it is healing. it isn't all better yet, we're still taking extreme care - but it is so much better. the trick: huggies pure and naturals, sensitive wipes & wash clothes with soap and water, a blow dry treatment, nystatin, plain yogurt and maalox dabbed on his tooshie. one part is frequent changes & not letting him sit on it - which has proven tricky a couple of times when we run into a "not quite done" and then we repeat the whole process 10 minutes later. i say we because it has been a 2 person job. sure, it can be done by one person, but it makes it so much easier if there are 4 helping hands.

meanwhile, mikey LOVES the tree. he likes to touch the lights. he's really good about just pointing to the ornaments and not pulling on them. sometimes we hear him mutter, "no, no!" while he's looking. he is definitely interested and i wouldn't be surprised if it gets knocked over at some point during the next month, but he's doing really well with it.

he's really starting to use walking as his primary mode of transportation. he's starting more and more to get mad if he falls and has to crawl. [he's still working on figuring out that he can crawl over to something to pull himself up, as standing up on his own is a little tricky. though i do love when he gets stuck on his knees and decides to walk on his knees.]

anyway, i really had a nice weekend. garrett let me sleep in a few mornings - what a treat! and even though there was a lot of nose wiping, we managed to not have too much grumpies and lots of laughter around here.

i'm so thankful for my boys. they are my greatest treasures. [said as tray-sures, a-la michael d.]

bottom update...

2011-11-23T19:59:00.000-07:00

had a little heart to heart with the pediatrician today after a particularly painful diaper change this morning. it left both mikey and i shaking and in tears. his bottom wasn't better & we'd been doing mia's combo mix for 3 days [thanks, mia!] and if anything it was getting worse. dr says it is a yeasty diaper rash that we need to go back to the nystatin and we can also do topical and oral treatments of: yogurt and maalox.

in case anyone is terribly curious as to what his heiny looks like, text me - i'll text you a picture. obviously i'm not putting it on here though. too many pervs in the world.

i don't feel great about this, but will do it for a few more days. in other good news, his ears are starting to look red, or at least on of them is, so no ear infection now... but in a couple of days, probably. today he had a fever and a green snotty nose.

good news is that the pediatricians office is open friday and saturday mornings like a clinic - first come, first serve. so if we need to, we can go have his ears looked at. again.

i'm exhausted and emotionally drained from a few nights of none of us sleeping well. it is not even 8 & i'm ready to climb in bed and give my back a break from standing in the kitchen making cheesecake and deviled eggs. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

p.s. garrett added some adorable youtube videos tonight... check it out.

behind on picture assignment

2011-11-21T08:00:00.001-07:00

i did project 365 for mikey & only had 2 days in that whole year where i had to scramble for a picture. i'm trying to do a one month assignment and i'm about 4 days behind now. i just have not been in the mood to worry about things that i don't need to worry about.

this is the start of the 3rd week of my back being out. before that we had the stomach flu. before that mikey had an ear infection. needless to say, it has been a rough month or two. when mikey started the roseola fever about a week and a half ago, he got diarrhea. and really, since then it hasn't gone away. which is a side effect of roseola, but it seems to be lasting longer than normal. at least longer than i'm comfortable with. here's why: his butt has been RAW for a week now.

in the last few days, he's developed 2 sores on his bottom, where the little cheeks rub together. there are other red spots that look like they could turn into sores any minute. garrett has been super helpful about changing diapers because of my back [and he's just typically helpful] so i've not seen some of the bad diaper changes. but when i do change a yucky poop and see how red his bottom gets on top of the bumps and sores, it leaves me queasy. as i type this post, i'm shaking still from a change that i just did. he cringes and shakes when you change him, usually with tears.

i feel like i've tried everything & nothing is doing anything. here's a list of what we've tried:

neosporin
lavender
nystatin
caldesene powder
balmex
huggies pure and natural - literally the most expensive diapers i have seen!
sensitive wipes
aquaphor
maalox dabs
butt paste
frequent tubbies
oatmeal baths
airing out - which doesn't work, he's a scratcher. we learned this the hard way. add scratch marks to an already raw bottom, that does not help things!!!

i feel like i'm at my wits end. any one with suggestions beyond what we've already done??? please, please, please. we've got one little boy who's not happy about his rear end situation and one mom who has sympathy pains.

day 16: long exposure

2011-11-16T18:52:00.001-07:00

i'm not a photographer. i don't know how to do a long exposure picture. so i'm going with a play on words of sorts. mikey has had a long exposure to books. he loves to sit and look at them himself. we read to him everyday. before bed, we try to read 3 books. the last one we read to him every night is goodnight moon, a favorite and classic. [he loves pointing at the red balloon when he sees it!] i hope that he grows up loving to read. the teacher in me will be so proud, i will feel like i did something right, at least - no matter what. i love his bedtime routine. we take turns - switch off nights, cause i didn't want mikey to get too dependent on either one of us, in case i had book club or something. we make sure he's not thirsty, we brush teeth, we read books. we used to sing some lullabies but haven't been doing that for a while & he's just fine. we lay him down and give him his blankey and stuffed animals. most nights, no tears. i love it. i feel like he's a happy, well adjusted little man. i feel positive about the habits we're helping him form. ok. that's my long exposure... goo' night.

i'm getting ready for the holidays

2011-11-16T11:51:00.001-07:00

we're trying to decide where to put the christmas tree this year. obviously, "mikey's toy corner" isn't an option anymore. he'd knock that thing down every single day [probably all day long] i think over behind the kitchen table where we can use the cage to keep him from getting at it all day long.
trying to decide where to put it is making me really want to put it up right now. but i will wait. til next friday.
i'm starting to be really excited about holiday treats. pinterest has really been naughty for me as a place to collect food ideas. once thanksgiving is here, i will be making lots of treats. some new experiments. lots of old favorites and goodies.
buckeyes. cheeseballs. diarrhea dip. oh my. monkey bread. cheesecake. caramel popcorn. oh my.
i had the idea of starting december 1st making a calendar and plotting to make a treat or something festive every day. that way i'm not overwhelmed the week of christmas. i'm not just making dessert treats, either. i'm talking about favorite soups, delicious breakfasts [that are basically treats in disguise] and other appetizers that i just don't seem to make any other time of year. ham wrapped asparagus spears. a crapload of deviled eggs. this is sort of like our very own advent calendar. i can't wait
today we're going to make a list of all of the things that we want to make. it is a whole family affair.
i've been reading a lot of good books lately & i can't wait to just wrap up [not by the fireplace cause we don't have one. sad face.] with some hot chocolate and read by the light of the christmas tree.
garrett has 2 weeks off at christmas. we're going to have some movie marathons & great family together time. mikey will be in heaven having his daddy around all day long for so long. he's even got snow pants now - i can't wait to see how he loves sledding or playing in the snow.
i'm craving some puzzles.
i'm not trying to rush november away. there's still so much to do. i'm just really enjoying the planning part as of right now. the calendar is quickly filling up and i like that. i love the busy time of year. its a productive time of year for me - i swear, i'm messed up, but when i'm busier i'm much more productive.
i've had some really good ideas for gifts for some people. and then others i'm completely blank. i don't like that.
christmas cards are brewing in my head, too. this is such an exciting time of year.
with all of my food plotting - i'm realizing more and more that i'm going to have to make sure and keep my exercising a high priority or else i'll gain back these 8 pounds that i've lost recently. oh boy.

day 15: sorta silhouette

2011-11-16T11:13:00.000-07:00

this is as close as we could come to a silhouette. i do love those cheeks.

day 14: eyes

2011-11-14T18:29:00.001-07:00

i was going to do a picture of my eyes, after "yesterday's post" about my beautifiers... but then i didn't put an ounce of makeup on today so that was a no go for take off. then tonight, mikey was playing on the keyboard for garrett's ipad. i kept trying to take a picture of him and everytime i would talk to him, he'd try and swat me away. i was buggin. so finally i just decided to capture his intense eyes. i love them.

day 13: me & 13 things

2011-11-14T18:27:00.002-07:00

13 very important beautifiers... 1) flat iron - though i only use that for my fringe these days. 2) eye lash curler. 3) hair rubber band. i can't do without these guys. 4) tooth brush - to keep the cavities away. 5) phomollient - momma like the smell. 6) confixor - momma likey that it keeps my hair sort of under control. 7) oil mattifier - for my greasy forehead. 8) age defying eye cream. duh. 9) eye primer - to keep the eye shadow in place. 10) oil free moisturizer - cause i have a few crazy dry spots of skin that so far only this bad boy can take care of. 11) aveda mosscara - P-dub introduced me to this & i enjoy. 12) eye liner - taupe. 13) eye shadow brush. everyone should have a nice set of brushes for their makeup. they just should. it makes a difference.

i'm not saying i'm pretty, but i do get complimented on my eyes & i have a few tricks. but these things help me. i'm 32 and i don't want to age my skin, so for almost 10 years, i've been using age defying products. i like when things make my hair smell good - cause i can't always keep the frizz away. anyways...

day 12: sunset

2011-11-12T21:33:00.002-07:00

i don't have a sunset picture today. there was no sun. it was completely cloudy all day long. all of a sudden it was just dark out. i do have this cute head to share though. sorry... i know, another mikey picture. good news: no fever today. one of these days, i need to catch on video how we "charge" each other & then wrestle. it is my favorite. you know how on elf he says "smiling is my favorite"? well this is my favorite. i love making that little dude giggle. it is wonderful.

got a sunset last night...

day 11: something blue

2011-11-12T08:39:00.000-07:00

i should've posted this last night, i took the picture yesterday, but then forgot til i was laying in bed. i didn't feel like getting up to do it. it was a long day. he had a fever for the third day in a row. which came with "crabbiness and fits of energy but mostly just wanting to be held. by daddy." in the afternoon, his fever kinda broke. then he went back up again to 101 before bed. who knows. for now we're all just sort of blue waiting to find out what is wrong with him.

day 10: a childhood memory

2011-11-10T18:09:00.001-07:00

when i was pretty little, i wanted to be an astronaut. i wanted to go to the moon someday. i had a telescope and loved reading books about the planets. garrett took this picture of the moon tonight - it is huge! i love it. [and yes, i pretty much still love looking at the moon and imagining.]

day 9: someone i love

2011-11-10T18:08:00.000-07:00

i apologize for not posting this yesterday, i did take the picture yesterday. it was just an awful, busy day... mikey had a 102-103 degree fever yesterday. in the morning, he was happy spirited, maybe just wanted to be held more than normal. by evening - he was lethargic and cranky. it had me really nervous. mikey wanted nothing but his daddy. he loves his daddy so much. i love the kind of dad garrett is. i tell mikey all of the time that he will probably never know how good he has it.

day 8: a bad habit

2011-11-08T19:10:00.000-07:00

growing up, i had to make my bed. as an adult, i am very lazy about making my bed. i plan on making mikey make his bed. at some point, i'm going to have to start making my bed. shut up, dad - i know.

day 7: fruit

2011-11-07T18:06:00.000-07:00

i saw on pinterest that if you take your bananas apart, they'll brown slower. i'm testing them out this time. p.s. mikey loves mango. loves. i love him. love. all is good in the world. [see how i can make anything about mikey? its a trick i've learned.]

walking video

2011-11-06T19:07:00.000-07:00

he can walk. it is so fun. it is still more fun to throw himself at us. and crawling is much faster, but he's really getting the hang of it. he can stop and balance himself instead of just falling now. i love it.

day 6: low angle

2011-11-06T18:23:00.000-07:00

mikey's favorite thing to do these days - walk this little bike/car/walker dude. i love that this picture is blurred because he's always moving. he loves it. i love watching him go away from me because his bum is so stinking cute the way it shakes just a little. and then i love watching him come towards me because he is so proud and happy. i love this boy.

day 5: from a high angle

2011-11-05T14:28:00.000-06:00

we were practicing walking this morning. but he couldn't concentrate while i had the camera out.

halloween... finally

2011-11-04T18:41:00.001-06:00

mikey was woody for halloween. well, really - he was sicky for halloween. but we managed to get him dressed up for a few hours and went over to jared and liz's lil' halloween party. before we went, we got a few pictures [even 1 or 2 non blurry ones. blurry because he was moving a lot!] and even that one really cute one of him wearing his hat. he wore it for about 5 seconds, total. i like mikey/woody.

day 4: something green

2011-11-04T18:23:00.000-06:00

mikey was wearing his adorable green camo jammies this morning, but garrett went and got him dressed on me. mikey loves tossing the tennis ball around with anyone willing to participate. funny mikey-ism... we've decided he's part wolf. when he's angry, he puts his head back, chest out & howls. tonight, he was also crawling around chanting, "die!" - we're hoping that he doesn't really know what he's saying. he was also having a lot of fun walking across the room tonight. i love that he's really getting the hang of walking. he can stop and catch his own balance if he wants to. mind you, throwing himself at either one of us is still more fun sometimes. but he can do it! i love him. this week, as i've seriously had zero energy and just all around felt like crap - his little self is the one thing making me still smile. this has been a nasty stomach flu!

day 3: clouds

2011-11-03T19:43:00.002-06:00

these clouds aren't nearly as dreary as my day was. it was a very hard, very long day. i hope tomorrow is better.

day 2: what i wore today

2011-11-02T16:52:00.000-06:00

today is recovery day from yesterday's flu. still not feeling 100%. i say that you all should just be happy that i put makeup and a bra on. yoga pants are my favorite to lounge in.

day 1: self-portrait

2011-11-02T08:28:00.003-06:00

i think this was supposed to be done in october, according to wherever i found it. i think on pinterest. i can't remember and i'm still a little sicky from yesterday. [stomach flu has pretty much wiped us all out in the last 3 days.] i managed to get a picture yesterday, but i didn't have the energy to sit at my computer to post. so today is catch up day.

my self portrait is kinda forced. believe me, you do not want to know what my face looked like yesterday. [not that it is any better yet today.] my foot is in the picture. along with the feet of my 2 favorite people.

oh & i'm going to try and find a few minutes later today to download halloween pictures, so don't worry, mamasita.

mikey & big mike

2011-10-30T16:29:00.000-06:00

it really is fitting that mikey is named after his grandpa and his dad. everyone says that mikey looks so much like garrett & he does, don't get me wrong. but he also looks a lot like the baby picture i have of my dad. and he's also got a lot of my dad's little traits. like the red hair. betcha didn't know that my dad was also a redhead as a kid. betcha didn't know that mikey gets his mad drumming skills from his grandpa. betcha didn't know that mikey isn't the first person that could kill me with a dirty look. [i've always said growing up that a stern look from my dad was the worst punishment you could threaten me with.] i know i've said it before, but i love that this little boy is named after my two other favorite men in my life.

there is a picture of my dad holding mikey when he was less than a week old. one time when we were passing it, i took it down off the wall so mikey could give it a kiss. then he started asking [not in words, but actions - that no mother would not understand] to kiss it often when we walked past it. we also talk to my parents on the phone a lot. and video chat. mikey has now started saying hello ["w'oh?"] and pointing to his ear after seeing that picture of grandpa. he's connecting that picture of grandpa with the video that he talks to and the goofball that he video chats with. i love it. cause i don't love that we don't get to see my parents whenever we'd like. so this makes up for it just a bit.

oh and just so no other grandparents get hurt in the writing of this blog post: mikey loves his grandma, nana and papa. and so do i. :)

even with a fat lip, that face can't be beat...

2011-10-29T19:35:00.000-06:00

mikey smacked his face into the side of the tubby tonight. i was in the kitchen and heard garrett gasp. then i heard mikey start screaming. not the mad cry, the very bad painful cry. i ran in & garrett was already holding him. there was a lot of blood right away, so garrett sent me into the other room. first thing i did was grab my phone and call my parents, cause that is what i do in crisis mode. run from the problem and call my parents. a few seconds later, i faced the mess and went into the other bathroom to find garrett sitting and holding a cold washcloth up to his mouth. the bleeding was slowing down a little, but as soon as i held my baby boy, the crying stopped. talk about warming your heart. he might not realize that i'm worthless in a crisis mode yet, but i think someday he'll figure me out. garrett kept trying to stop the bleeding and eventually we got him dressed. i tried to hold him and let him suck on an ice pack, but he wanted to get down to play. too bad for him it was bedtime. i am dreading seeing that fat lip in the morning. i hope that the 2 little cuts heal quickly. now if someone could just tell my body to calm down and stop freaking out...

a day of firsts

2011-10-25T22:05:00.001-06:00

mikey had a big day today.

he took his first steps back and forth between his daddy and me. he's taken a step or two before to get to something, but never intentionally. today he walked as much as 4-5 steps, but usually was 2-3.
before he stepped, he was holding a book and standing for a good 15-20 seconds.
he shhhh-ed. as in he held his finger up to his mouth and shhh-ed. and my mouth. and garrett's mouth. he saw me do it and immediately caught on.
he blew my mom a kiss while video chatting. completely unassisted. she loved it.
he started really milking the waving and saying "hi!" to everyone.

he's completely given up his afternoon naps, but desperately needs his morning nap. [one day last week, i was trying to push his nap of the day to the afternoon & he fell asleep on the floor during lunch. poor kid.] he's now going to bed between 6:30 and 7 and sleeping til 7. personally, i'd rather have him up around 6:30, taking 2 naps and going to bed between 7:30 and 8, but whatever is working for him, i guess. somedays i make him lay in his bed for a little quiet time during what used to be his afternoon nap with some books and music, because he's tired but won't sleep. he'll last for about an hour before he's done there. if you go for a drive in the afternoon, he's out. pretty quickly. he's so tired when he goes to bed that he doesn't even cry usually. if he does cry, he wants whoever didn't put him to bed to go in and love on him a little. [we trade nights so he's used to the routine and not the person so much.] he loves having his teeth brushed. his favorite part is when you brush his tongue. "gogs" are still his favorite, and yes - every animal is currently a gog, and he was ecstatic today when he realized his shirt had a gog on it. he talked about it all throughout the day. i'm so excited for him to start walking now. when he took the first few steps, i was so surprised and excited that i immediately started crying then laughing. i'm not dreading him walking, it is just a big step. he really enjoyed falling into our arms, so the motivation to actually walk was a little distracted. he also really loves holding onto your hands and walking backwards. such a trickster, that boy. we also sat and argued back and forth with "yes" and "no" today. about what, i don't know. i don't think there was a reason. it was cute, because when he says no, he usually really scrunches up his forehead at you. i probably shouldn't encourage his arguing with me. i love this little boy. absolutely and completely. to steal a line from a sappy love song, "every little thing he does is magic." sappy, but true. since figuring out the ear infection last week, me being a little more sensitive to his needs and me not fighting the way it used to be, i'm back to completely enjoying him. wish i had a new picture to post with this, but i didn't break out the camera today. tomorrow...

He's wonderful!

2011-10-22T12:04:00.001-06:00

I love Garrett. Yesterday was his birthday. I tried very hard to make it special. He makes everyday so special for me. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world, because I have someone like him taking care of me, looking out for me, loving me every day. He even cleaned up his own party last night because he knew my stomach was hurting. Wonderful man, I tell you!

pay close attention to his expression in the last picture...

2011-10-20T08:24:00.000-06:00

what do you do with a face so cute? even when he's sick, he's always delightful in the tubby. right before i left to go to recipe club last night, garrett had mikey in the tub & he was being too cute. so i grabbed the camera. when i got home, garrett told me that before going to bed, he was kinda crying for "momma" and that melted my heart. he seems to be feeling better today, although i think his cold is moving into his lungs a little more. he's coughing a little bit and seems a little wheezy. we'll keep an eye on that.

here go, neddie:

2011-10-18T12:40:00.000-06:00

i got an email from my mom this morning telling me that she needs some more pictures of mikey. i have been feeling bad. now that "project life - mikey's first year" is over, i've definitely been relaxing about the camera. quite honestly, i haven't had the camera out because a lot of days, there just haven't been that many picture worthy moments. the last few weeks, really - since we've been home from our vacation - have been tough. for mikey and for me. he caught a runny nose while we were up there and somewhere along the way has developed an ear infection. but, like me, he doesn't run fevers... so his sick behavior has been confusing to us and falsy interpreted as just hornery/fussiness. some days, he just crawls around [if you're really lucky he'll even drag his head because he's exhausted!] kinda grumpy and frustrated. our house is pretty well baby proofed, so when he swats at me and scratches my face, i've backed off and just let him kinda do his thing. it made me sad, but i was dreading that this was just a not so pleasant phase that we're entering into. i didn't want him to have a whole demeanor change but i was trying not to be too negative about it. though, quite honestly, it has been bothering me. there has been a time or two that i shed a tear while complaining to garrett about how this isn't as fun a stage for me, that all of a sudden it all seems like a lot harder work. not that he's been completely rotten, he hasn't. it has just been less pleasant. harder. stressful for me. and now, we realize - more than just teething pain and unpleasantness. so now, i've got a good healthy dose of guilt to deal with.

my baby should still be napping & probably will once this antibiotic kicks in. he should still be playing with toys. he should still like his momma. he'll stop yelling at me all of the time. i just need to be more in tuned. not feel embarrassed about taking him in to have his ears checked, when he's had a runny nose. he doesn't get fevers, neither do i. i have to remember that. i don't have to just put up with unpleasantness. all in all, we'll get through this. and i'm glad garrett said that i need to take him in yesterday, because i was fighting it. thanks, love.

right now, mikey and i are going to go cuddle up on the couch and watch a show i've dvr-ed from animal planet. this kid is big into "gogs" right now. all animals are dogs - "gogs" and he gets very excited about them. maybe if i'm lucky, he'll go down for a nap later. we'll see.

and momma, i'll try to be better with posting pictures. xo.

almost 13 months

2011-10-05T13:20:00.002-06:00

this is the view of mikey you will mostly see nowadays. unless you can distract him with food offers.

mikey is on the go nowadays, that is for sure. for 6 months, i had this excellent player. the kid didn't move so he sat in his little toy corner and would play for hours on end. now his favorite toys are the gate at the top of the stairs, the high chair and the treadmill. he's fast, too.

he also loves to walk along the furniture, the walls, you... he'll stand for a moment or two until he realizes that he's not supported and then he'll grab or fall down.

he is doing really well if i hand him a book when he goes down for a nap, to distract him from the fact that he gets irate about me leaving him in there alone. he would stand up and scream before i figured out the book trick... thank heavens that is done.

he went through a week or so before our yellowstone trip that he would cry if he was stuck with me and not garrett. i finally told garrett that he had to be very particular about the times he would come out - because it felt like i was just getting mikey settled and garrett would come out to fill his water bottle and i had to deal with the fit all over again. sometime during our trip, he stopped rejecting me so much and remembered that he loves his momma, too. now, i'd say that his favorite thing to do is have daddy hold him and lean over and give momma kisses.

his kisses are the best thing ever. even open mouthed and drooly.

mikey makes for an interesting work out. i've been doing the shred or the wii fit... and he doesn't know what to think of it, except that if i'm down on the floor, he should be on top of me. or if i'm doing any sort of stepping activity, he should be in between my legs.

he knows the things that he shouldn't be doing... he starts saying "no no" when he crawls to the gate and stands up, hanging on it.

he has a toy cell phone. [real phone, not in use] that he holds up to his ear. it is a flip phone & neither of us have had one in his lifetime. how he's figured that out, i don't know.

his teeth have really been hurting the last few days - he's chewing on everything. right now his new birthday links that he got from aunt tiff are his favorite... he's been a lot grumpier than normal, but still a good kid.

i still can't get over how much people stop me in the store to tell me how cute he is. redheads get a lot of attention. smiley redheads - even more. wonderfully adorable, smiley redheads - watch out. you can not get in and out of a store in 20 minutes if there are old ladies around. they all will stop us and smile at him.

he crawls over to our bedroom door and knocks on it hoping for his dad to answer. kinda melts my heart.

garrett got this 1 year old picture at big springs, in island park on our trip... could he get any cuter? i think not.

i love my little ginger!

i did forget to mention - mikey loves playing peek-a-boo... only he says "bap" instead of boo. it is a great game that he can play for a long time. and sometimes even after you are done - he'll still be over saying "bap!"

not everyone has an iphone...

2011-09-29T17:50:00.001-06:00

i'm a huge dork. i know it. but one of my favorite things in yellowstone is to find as many license plates as possible. and having an iphone - it makes it much easier [holly, that is a dig...] to make notes as you go. [holly, also note that this is an instagram picture....'nother dig.]

here's the states that we saw. if there is an h after - i spotted it. if there is a g - garrett. mind you, he was driving & i was scouting. but i do feel good about myself for seeing so many! and i took the hawaii picture because mikey was asleep at the lower falls & garrett wasn't with me as i drove around the parking lot & hit the hawaiian jackpot. i didn't want him to think i made it up, so a picture was taken.

Alaska -h
Arkansas -h
Washington -h
Montana -h
Colorado - g
California - h
Oregon - h
Nebraska - h
Illinois -h
Arizona -h
Florida -h
Minnesota - h
Pennsylvania - g
Wisconsin - h
Kentucky -h
Maryland -h
Tennessee - h
Texas - h
New York - h
Missouri - h
South Dakota -h
Oklahoma - h
South Carolina - h
North Dakota - h
Ohio - h
West virginia - h
Louisiana - h
Kansas - h
Massachusetts - h
Iowa-h
Hawaii - h
Virginia - h
North Carolina- h
Michigan - h
Maine - h
New Mexico - h
Indiana- g
Vermont - h
New jersey -h
Mississippi -h
Utah - Deb (Thanks for the reminder!!)

65

2011-09-29T10:23:00.001-06:00

today's my dad's birthday. my grandpa wrote on his facebook wall this morning & it made me cry. here's what he said:

"Our dear son... It dosn't seem possible that it is your 65th BD today. Only yesterday we greeted our firstborn as a newborn. And all through the years we have been proud of you. So many reasons for that pride. I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat as I remember them. A little boy at his first day of school.. so confident and proud. A big boy who kneeled in the sealing room and was sealed to his eternal love. The loving son who calls often to check on his old and feeble parents. The man who sees nothing as important as filling his role as a father and grandfather, willing to sleep on the floor with them, write the annual birthday letter, and all the other things that make you so special in their hearts. I could go on and on, but all it would do is make me cry. We send our eternal love to you. Dad."

The funny thing about this is that my dad doesn't do facebook... this post might be the only place he sees what my grandpa wrote. which is part of the reason why i'm sharing it - to help the old guy out. but my grandpa is right - there are so many reasons to be proud of the man that he is, way more than i will list... i know he is incredibly special to each and every one of his daughters and his wife. we're all so lucky to have him in our lives. dad, thanks for being the kind of dad that i would want to name my son after you to constantly have that example & reminder of what he should grow up to become!

happy birthday, dad!!!

a slew of "dog" pictures

2011-09-28T18:55:00.000-06:00

we went to yellowstone with garrett's brothers and parents this last [long] weekend. it was so much fun. we stayed in island park. on the drive up, we stopped at bear world... which was way cooler than i could've ever expected it to be. garrett's parents were so generous & took us on a feed-the-bears tour. we fed bears. we rode through the park in a truck and then threw food at them. they followed us around and then sat and caught the food that we threw at them. it was amazing. [there was something about babies on this trip that i couldn't get over. probably because of someone named mikey...]

then we drove to rexburg and drove through campus quickly... talk about a change [growth] from when i was there from 97 - 99. they now have a temple. craigo's no longer has the twisty breadsticks, but they do have some delicious gourmet pizza. and there are tons of homes, apartments, restaurants - that place is huge compared to the last time i was there. and yet, when i walked into the gas station - still small town, friendly country folk. that did my heart good.

yellowstone was gorgeous as always. we drove all over the park. we didn't see any moose or bears in the park, but everyone saw moose at big springs [a place about 5 miles down the road from the island park condo] and we saw bears at bear world. mckay spotted some bald eagles flying over a river. we saw plenty of buffalo and some elk herds. it was a great time.

yesterday morning, the day we were leaving, everyone was sleeping in a little bit. well, everyone without small children. we'd contained mikey in our room without toys for about an hour and had pretty much maxed out our happy before breakfast time, so we decided to jump in the car and drive up to big springs. i was the only one who hadn't seen moose in the wild yet & it was my last chance. so we jumped in the car. and we hit the jackpot. we didn't even get to big springs before we found one moose on the side of the road. watching her for about 10 minutes, all of a sudden i spotted 3 more moose off in the distance coming straight at us. the four of them sat and played right behind our car - less than a bus length away for about a half hour before they crossed the road and went into the other trees. i was beside myself with excitement. mikey was too - he'd look out the window and say "gog!"

the only thing that i was excited about while driving home yesterday was sleeping in my own bed. so, i don't want to force anyone to watch our videos... so i will provide links in another post. you can watch them if you please. [also, i'd like to credit garrett with these pictures... he took 99% of them.]

p.s. mikey calls all animals dogs. or "gog" in mikey tongue. kinda melts my heart.

monday morning babbles

2011-09-19T10:06:00.000-06:00

mikey crawled over to the little bookshelf/entry table that we have at the top of the stairs today and pulled out the scrapbook that shawnie made for us for our wedding - a guest sign in book.

hunter and hannah signed every single page.
connor's name is spelled wrong. which made me do the wicked laugh cause holly's had problems with people spelling his name wrong. whoever helped him clearly hadn't been briefed.
lots of people spelled my name wrong. awesome. sadly, i don't care as much as i probably should - that is because people have been spelling my name wrong since FOREVER.
i loved looking back at those [skinnier] pictures of myself and remembering that while heavier than i would've liked to have been, i didn't have that fat of a face and that for my current goals, i don't have to lose that much weight to lose some of the fat face that i loathe right now.
i also loved looking back at the messages people wrote.

since getting a new dishwasher, i have somehow been inspired to stay on top of the dishes, the kitchen, even enjoyed cooking just a little bit more. it is amazing to me that a dishwasher that i feel loads just a little bit more is prompting me to keep a cleaner kitchen.
this weekend, garrett installed child safety hooks on the cabinets. i hate them, but i feel that they are necessary to keep mikey out of trouble. what cracks me up is that everytime garrett and i open a lower cabinet now, we both scowl. i wonder how long it'll take us to start remembering that they're there.
mikey's all of a sudden really enjoying being rocked for a few minutes before sleep. interesting how such a little change can make such a big difference.
he also hasn't figured out that if he gets himself sitting up or standing up in bed, he could get himself back down. but his cries turn to screams and then we can just go in there and lay him back down and he's fine. crazy kid.
i got a haircut a few weeks ago and the girl thinned it out for me - i still can't get over how skinny my ponytail is and how much i love a good haircut.
7 teeth. that is his total right now. i love brushing them.
dry skin is ugly.
i went to the grocery store this morning with super crusty yoga pants on. and no makeup. and crazy bed head. and of course saw someone from the ward.
i just made a batch of cafe rio [really, chuy's] dressing and am now salivating in the sink as i load the dishwasher. i can't wait for a big plate of salad at lunch. green leaf lettuce, parmesan cheese, hard boiled egg, and sunflower seeds... and lots of dressing.
i went through and re-organized my boards and pins on pinterest & i'm finding that i like the site a whole lot more. seriously, whoever came up with that idea is a genius! it really makes me want to move into a bigger house... our house now is more about functionality than good decorating. i might actually look like i have some taste if i got into a house with a little more space someday. all thanks to pinterest.
time to go shower. miguelito is sleeping. this is precious time, people. precious.

monthly stickers

2011-09-15T13:04:00.000-06:00

12 delightful months - i have loved these stickers! [thanks again, aimee!]

tricks

2011-09-14T18:08:00.001-06:00

i am sorry, bloggers of the world. two video posts of my baby in a row. i try not to do that, but tonight he was performing up a storm and i caught it on video.

the best part about it is that when he watched it back on the computer, he repeated all of his tricks. it is pretty dang cute. he won't always perform on command, but tonight he was pretty proud of himself.

plus there is even better crawling footage, here... enjoy. :)

crawling video

2011-09-13T12:56:00.001-06:00

the first birthdaty wrap up

2011-09-12T14:18:00.000-06:00

let's start with the food: chips, salsa & guac as apps. then we had salad, mac & cheese and sliders. cake and cupcakes.

some random birthday faces from the night. you can see he was super tired. thank heavens he was still sweet, cause he was going on less than an hours nap all day long. it could've been a very ugly night. but he's a big one year old tough kid.

eating his cupcake(s) - at first he didn't know to eat it. he just played with it, but then he figured it out and ENJOYED IT.

he had a great time opening presents & giving thank you kisses. he got some new toys and some new outfits. we had a great time celebrating with our family! thank you everyone for the gifts - we're enjoying everything!

at mikey's 1 year well baby check up this morning, he didn't even flinch at the finger prick to check for anemia [he's not anemic] and even though we waited a while and he was getting tired, he was a happy, cheerful boy. but then it came time for shots and he took the first one with only giving a dirty look to the nurse. but then, he started doing the "I'M IN PAIN!" cry and i had to concentrate not to cry with him.

birthday stats: weight: 22 lbs 3 ounces - 45th percentile. length: 29.6 inches - 45th percentile. head: 46.3 centimeters - 45th percentile. so he's growing, but slowing down from where he was in the beginning [98th percentile from the 2-4 month marks...] and that is good.

i sure do love my birthday boy. i can't believe it has been a year. i know everyone says it, but time really does fly. cause we are having fun. i love this boy. he is really starting to crawl, too. and he is not far from walking either.

like water for chocolate in real life

2011-09-09T13:03:00.000-06:00

preface: i am not sad. seriously, i am not. except i did the ugly cry.

this morning i was doing some prep work for mikey's birthday party tomorrow night. as i was baking, i got a little sentimental and reflective. and when i looked over at my baby who should've been grumpy because he was ready for his morning nap, all i was greeted with was smiles and cheerful noises. the tears came a running.

so i went over to kiss on him and discovered that he was poopy. way to kill the moment, am i right? so my tears and i took this baby into his room to change him. he kept looking at me and smiling which only made me cry harder. which only made him laugh harder, which made me laugh and cry harder, too. it was a vicious, sweet cycle.

i put him down for his nap after a few minutes of whispering sweet nothings into his ear and kissing on him. by the time i made it out of there, i was beside myself. garrett came out and found me sobbing and just hugged on me. eventually i pulled myself together, though i am tearing up a bit as i remember how i felt this morning.

i am not sad. i never would've thought - knowing myself who has been a baby hog since i was too young to actually hold a baby - that i would like this stage better than the newborn stage. don't get me wrong, i adored the newborn stage. but this stage is easier. it is more interactive. it is tender. it can be naughty. it is growing and learning. my mom always tells me that the best stage is the one that they are in & i have found that i agree.

but i guess i'm finding this stage to be slightly overwhelming too. i love mikey so much. so much. i like him. his personality is completely heart warming. i love his tricks. i love his kisses. i love nursing him. i get sad about that being close to being over with. some of my favorite moments of the day involve the quiet little games that we play while nursing. these cuddly moments - make up for the first 6 weeks of nursing hell when my nipples were chapped and bleeding and painful. he's so close to - all of a sudden - walking. he's close to crawling though i am sort of in denial because he's seemed close for months.

he just today started sitting up from a laying down position. which is something that he should be doing by now, so i was starting to worry about that. i've been able to [mostly, except for when i talk to people who's kid was walking early and implies that something is wrong with my baby because he's not. grrr.] brush off any nervousness about him not walking or crawling, because the immobility was nice. even though he could roll anywhere he wanted.

so these big changes and growths, while exciting and necessary can be a little intense for me, too. i don't want him to stay a tiny baby forever, i like that this kid can stand on his own [if but for a second] and walk along furniture now - it is just a lot. it seems like yesterday that i was worrying if he'd ever sit up and he's been sitting up for over six months now. geez.

i'm just not ready to send him on a mission yet & i know that it is right around the corner. see, i'm not trying to freeze time, just to maybe slow it down a little - this last year went way too fast. while reflecting on the things he's done, i get lost in the thought that it was a year ago that my little newborn was whisked off to the NICU in the middle of the night and this game of worry-but-don't-over-do-it,mom bit me in the butt.

just remember, if you get to eat the chocolate cake tomorrow night - they were happy, loving tears.

mikey's birthday banner + birthday party prep

2011-09-02T13:43:00.002-06:00

yes. i know. cutest damn birthday banner you've ever seen.

please, people - contain yourselves. no you can not eat him for dinner. [he's mine!]

...a close up on a few of my absolute favorites...

a few things:

yes, i realize the banner is up over a week early. i don't care. it probably won't be coming down september 12th, either. i love it.
i got the pattern pieces over on sprik space. [if you haven't discovered aimee yet, you are really missing out. she's talented, genuinely nice and she shares!!!]
we had a lot of fun using glitter glue.
thanks to garrett for stringing up and hanging the banner.
i got the idea from this website [sorry holly and aimee, i can't remember where i found the idea, but i'm pretty sure it was from one of you.]
birthday party plans are in full developmental swing. i'm so excited.
holly designed the invitations for me & i absolutely love them. a copy will be included in project life. i will share the invitation on his birthday with pictures from his birthday party.
speaking of project life, as of yesterday morning, i was 5 months behind in journaling in the real book. that was very overwhelming. yesterday, i knocked out 2 months. i can spend a few more naps and evening hours and get caught up. i have a goal to have his book as complete as possible for his birthday, so people can look at it while they're visiting. garrett and i might be the only ones interested, but it is important to me to have ready.
i can not believe mikey is almost 1 year old. this year has FLOWN by. i have loved every non NICU moment of it, too. this baby is such a blessing.

notes on austin

2011-08-26T14:09:00.002-06:00

i don't understand how 10 days can go by so fast. especially while living out of a suitcase. but they did. we're home now and trying to get unpacked. i might still be living out of a suitcase for another 10 days.
hanging out with heather and just doing whatever is still so much fun. with a husband and a baby. although the husband worked. when i was single, i made it to her house about once a year for a long off track visit. i've missed those visits.
austin is hot. hot. HOT. i had sweaty lip mustaches way more often than one should. i had sweaty everything.
i got stung by a scorpion twice. then looked down and saw that it was sitting on my chest.
my "scorpion on your chest" removal process is very different from scott's. i froze in fear. scott moved.
garrett got stung, too. but only once.
mikey never got stung, thank heavens.
getting stung by a scorpion isn't fun, but it isn't that bad. they're just creepy.
i ate a lot of good food there. chuy's. rudy's. mighty fine. the mighty cone. double dave's. round rock donuts.
mikey LOVED rocky. he also loved his cousins.
i loved watching his cousins play with him and love on him.
i finally accepted the fact that hunter isn't sick and that he's just got a deep voice. that was a hard one, but i like 15 year old huntie. he's a cool kid. who rocks vans & nike.
we're still working on his sock situation. :)
it is kinda nice to have a niece willing to stay home and be there when he wakes up from his nap to watch him while we ran errands.
speaking of chuy's... i might have to make "the dip" tonight.
i loved getting to see garrett every day.
loved going on little late night runs to CVS with him, too. dates with your husband - no matter how simple... fun.
i didn't take enough pictures! stink!!!
james avery is still one of my favorite stores.
mikey pooped up his back in james avery. that wasn't chaotic at all.
there were a couple of things that happened on this trip that we laughed about so hard. but we will keep to ourselves. as hannah said once, "what happens in this house, stays in this house." probably better for us all.
2 flights = 2 extremely interesting rides. 2 psychos. one in front of us, one in back of us. that might be a whole 'nother blog post.
mikey did pretty good on the planes. he was tired and squawked a bit... but it surely could've been worse.
i heard hopey say "i don't care" a lot. and i keep hearing it in my head now and i miss that girl.
austin was bad for my eating better and exercising more. i wanted to eat nothing but junk. cold junk. and i wanted to sit as possibly still under a fan. while sipping ice water. oh well. there's always september.
i love my sister's kids. they're all growing up. way too fast. they're good kids though. i enjoyed each one of them... i hate that i don't get to see them as often as i'd like. not only do i love them, but i really like them, too.
hayden very generously gave up his room for 10 days. no complaining! he also melted my heart on a daily basis with his getting down and playing with mikey. it was so sweet. hayden was sooooo good to mikey.
i was looking forward to sleeping in my own bed. and mikey seemed happy to be back to his toys today. but that's about the only thing i'm happy to be home about. i mean, i'm happy to be home, but i wasn't dying. i wasn't wanting to be home... i felt so at home there. that's saying a lot for a long trip like this.
and now, after writing all of these memories out, i sigh and try not to cry. good memories. heather, thank you.

standing for peanut butter!

2011-08-12T19:26:00.003-06:00

two exciting things happened today. mikey shared a spoon of peanut butter with me. and loved it. he screamed when i walked away with an empty spoon. and he pulled his own self up to a standing position. in the tub. this boy - he's delightful.

you put your arms around me and i'm home. [or you are. whichever]

2011-08-04T16:09:00.000-06:00

i love this song. and when my man has been gone for 4 days, i get super sappy.

garrett, thanks for seeing through my walls. i miss you. i'm so glad you come home tonight.

and the scariest monster in the closet is...

2011-08-03T16:20:00.000-06:00

mikey is terrified of the vacuum. usually when i get it out of the closet, he stares it down. can't take his eyes off of it. i try to either hold him or have garrett take him in another room when i do it because how i figured it out wasn't pretty. a tortured, body shaking cry. well, i made a mistake in thinking that if he had his back to me playing super happily this morning, it wouldn't bother him. as soon as i turned it on, he whipped his head around and started screaming. poor kid. i held him and only vacuumed the living room because he squeezed me the entire time.

at the rate i'm going, i won't be winning any mother of the year awards.

p.s. don't google image search for "scary vacuum" or "haunted vacuum" - because you won't find what i was looking for. just a bunch of psycho pictures that will probably give me nightmares tonight.

his piggies

2011-08-02T21:09:00.000-06:00

there is something wrong with how much i like these piggies. i am not a foot person. i used to write people off if they had horrible feet. i used to scream if someone's feet touched me. i've gotten over that, but still [living in hawaii will do that to a person, you can't avoid bare feet there]. these feet though - i kiss on these piggies way more than is normal. i kiss the tops and the bottoms. i like their smell. i like that he wiggles his toes soooooo much. i like that he pushes down on this lip when he's eating if i take too long with the next bite. i like how pudgy they are. that like that they're googly, but getting un-googled a little. i like 'em. i like 'em. i like 'em.

i would move "up" if i could!

2011-08-01T17:53:00.000-06:00

i wish i would've taken more pictures of rooms like bathrooms and the kitchen. i loved the hardware, the details - while i'm not sure that the movie shows those rooms as much, it was simply fantastic. they did such a good job replicating the movie. it was really fun to go see, even if there was a horrible, ugly thunderstorm going on outside at the time. and now, i'm going to go watch at least the beginning of the movie again to double check things. if you live anywhere near herriman, you should go see this place! thanks, jared & liz for taking us!!!

hogwarts math

2011-07-29T11:01:00.000-06:00

so, i'm reading harry potter - the whole series - right now. i'm at the end of 3. yesterday, for some reason, i started thinking as i was reading about how many kids are at hogwarts. i was thinking about it and reading at the same time. trying to do too many things at the same time.

here's my mentality:

5 boys joined Gryffindor the year Harry did. Probably about 5 girls joined, too... Although, I can only think of Hermione, Lavender & Parvati.

So about 10 new kids per house each year. 4 houses. 7 years. What I really meant to say was "7 times 4 is 28, right?" keep in mind that i'm still reading as i'm doing this mental math. but what came out was: "what's 4 times 10?" in a yell. so really, it was, "WHAT'S 4 TIMES 10?" garrett didn't even skip a beat before he yelled right back at me "FORTY!"

we both laughed so hard. in fact, i laughed so hard i drooled. the way it came out of me, garrett knew that it was a mistake, but he couldn't help but give me some sh!t about it.

what is wrong with me? poor mikey. his mom is a loon.

p.s. i highly recommend what i'm doing. reading all of the books again. after i finish each book, i watch the movie. and move on. i am loving it. it might become a summer tradition.

here's a little picture i just found when i google searched "hogwarts" images...

oh and this post by my friend, jori - LOVED IT.

wilbur's revenge

2011-07-17T20:59:00.000-06:00

yesterday we went to famous daves with garrett's parents and brother for lunch. which is fun in and of itself. but the reason why i'm posting about it is because mikey got some super hot spicy wing sauce and lived to tell. but he can't talk yet, so i'm telling. it all started when garrett ordered the absolute hottest wings they have to offer. they were called "wilbur's revenge" and had 6 hot peppers next to them. for scale, their buffalo wings only had 2 peppers. and the buffalo wings had kick to them, they surely weren't mild.

now, let me tell you that i've never seen garrett get stumped with hotness in food. you should sample his "mild' hot salsa that he makes. it burns. i can't handle the hot stuff. and i like spicy too. momma likey buffalo wings.

when his wings came, garrett started sweating. they were hot. he ate 3 total before he couldn't take it anymore. he put one on my plate so that i could see how how they were. i got some sauce on my finger and tasted it and said, "get that off my plate, i'm not eating it!" it made my eyes water. so he did. i wiped up my plate with my napkin. but i didn't get it all gone because i also had mikey grabbing at my silverware constantly & i was slightly distracted with that.

well, i had been sharing my pineapple with mikey. the pineapple was right next to the spot that garrett put his wing nugget o' fiery hell. i cut him off a little piece and gave it to him, forgetting that my plate had wilbur's revenge still on it.

the next thing i know, mikey's face is bright red, his eyes are watering & his mouth is puckered as he kinda looks around the table whining a little bit. he didn't cry. he's a tough kid. i gave him a few ice cubes to chew on and made a mental note in my own little "DCFS tales" journal that i've always threatened holly with. i felt awful.

do not read if you haven't seen the movie.

2011-07-16T21:53:00.001-06:00

see how tricky i am, not even telling you what movie? you should know. you just should.

seriously. if you haven't seen the movie. don't read this post. i'm not giving you anymore warnings. come back and chime in when you've seen it.

i can't believe it is all over. i was going to wait to see it for a week or so, to miss all of the crazies. but then everyone on facebook was seeing it and it made my skin crawl. i've never been patient. and then we accidentally got tickets for friday, instead of saturday. i wasn't disappointed. i loved the movie. it was very well done.

my friend posted about her thoughts on the movie. i'm copying and pasting my comments to her post. she was kind enough to just include her thoughts in her comments. so as not to spoil it for anyone. i'm not so kind. here's what i said:

*i loved mcgonagall... i cried pretty much in every scene - everything she said. i leaned over to garrett & said that the teacher in me has always loved her so much.

*i loved hermione & ron's kiss.

*i didn't like the voldefetus thing. i don't remember it from the book & it was icky.

*i loved neville taunting the death eaters/bad guys on the bridge. i loved him all along. that little orphan always had a soft spot in my heart.

*i think they could've shown a little more about what a jerk james potter was to severus snape.

*i also didn't like how frumpy ginny was at the end. and i loved ron's gut. happens to the best of us, weasley!

*i'm sad that it is all over. i can't wait to see it again. probably in theaters - for sure before mikey was born, but it will be pre-ordered on amazon, FOR SURE!!!

this movie has prompted me to read all of the books again. and as i finish the book, i'm going to watch the movie. we'll see how long this takes me - will i watch #7.2 in the theater again or at home on dvd? i'll let you know.

now, it is getting late & i'm going to go climb into my bed and start on chamber of secrets again.

mix tape mania 2011

2011-07-13T20:36:00.000-06:00

Remember back in the day when blogging was fun? (yes, that is a dig. at you. at me. at all of us.) When we made new friends and we were all obsessed? Before Facebook and smart phones took all the personality out of blogging? Back when I was angry and cynical and needed a forum to vent about my students. My life. I loved blogging. I still do, but because this has always been a public journal for me. Not some way to whore out my craftiness (since I have none) or business (I was a terrible Mary Kay sales person). Just a good ol' fashioned place to interact and share. One of my favorite things we did was mixed tape sharing. Of course the tapes were CDs, but you get my drift.

I'm going out on a limb here and organizing a mix tape mania shares*alot. You have until Friday to let me know if you want to participate. Then I will email everyone over the weekend and let you know how many people are participating and how many copies you'll need to send. You'll mail to me, I will then mail out everyone's mix combos. I would like to have everyone get their copies to me by the end of next week & then I will try to get them mailed out ASAP. It could be fun if you balls up and participate. Leave a comment here if you want to do it with your email address.

the irony of this post is that i typed 95% of it on my iPhone. forgive my hypocrisy. please still participate. i've already thought up a lot of my playlist... think: adele + ingrid + gaga + florence... i'm excited!

best for last at chilis...

2011-07-12T17:54:00.001-06:00

sometimes husbands travel a lot. and sometimes wives get bored and lonely.

when that happened to me just now, i blasted "best for last" by adele and danced with my baby boy.

it made things a little better, cause this baby loves to dance.

it is not the lyrics that make me love that song... in fact, they're not really applicable to my life. but the music, the beat - that speaks to my soul.

and now, i'm off to chilis for dinner. my friend robyn accepted my pathetic facebook dinner invitation...

10 monthers...

2011-07-11T12:38:00.001-06:00

please vote to help me choose his 10 month pictures...

#1:

#2:

#3:

#4:

#5:

and, where would we be without the outtakes? this kid has some faces!

i just can't decide. garrett, you're good!

we had a lovely independence day!

2011-07-05T15:45:00.000-06:00

mikey and all of his cousins [that are born so far... one more on the way.]

you can see how beautiful she is here, but you just can't understand how adorable she is until you talk to her. last night i heard her offer to babysit mikey for us... goodness. i love her.

we were posing. looking at these pictures bring on a new level of disgust with my fatness. but i won't go into that here... i'm supposed to just be reminiscing about a nice holiday.

rylie was lovin' on mikey. it was sorta a hard day for him. he missed out on a nap and then had to stay up 3 hours later than normal. we're making up for lost naps today!

thanks, nana for the shirt!

mikey-isms that are especially endearing to me today

2011-07-01T08:36:00.002-06:00

when i sneeze a couple times, mikey watches with a half grin. then says "whoa!" at the end of it all.
tilting his head to his shoulder... for no apparent reason. just figured out that he can.
when he gets nervous about what i'm eating, because i'm not sharing with him - he puts his hands to his ears.
when i do share & he is enjoying my morning bowl of cereal with him, he flaps his hands a bunch.
pointing and reaching. the best is the one handed reach when he wants to be picked up.
the expression and blinks he gives a toy when it is beyond his reach. but it has his attention.
how ticked off he gets at the last bite of his meal. how does he know?
when he knocks a toy beyond his reach and he raises his eyebrows at it, as if to say, "hey, come back."
the grunts, the leaning forward, the leg straigtening... basically working on a pooper with no privacy.
how when i hand him something, if i get all excited about it and talk in a high pitched voice and say "what is this?" he'll do a high pitched growl at it. even if it is the same tube of hydrocortizone that he gets at every diaper change.
every time i go to get him out of his crib, he's always got his feet in his hands.
how he hates the plastic lined bibs. he always yanks on them. sometimes they come off and then he sits and plays with them some more so proudly. he doesn't tug a non plastic lined one.
while nursing, i'll tickle the small of his back or his side. he will sit and giggle. sometimes, depending on how tired he is, he'll try to swat my hand away. or he'll try not to laugh about it. other times, i haven't tickled him and he starts giggling. it is his way of asking me to play.
even when the water at the pool is cold enough to keep me from going in, he just takes a deeeeeeeeeeeeep breath and enjoys it all the same. talk about one relaxed little boy.
how he tries so hard to take off hats. his little orange baseball cap, he can get off almost immediately. his bucket hat is trickier, although he has gotten it off a few times. thank heavens for that chin strap!
how his feet can get just a faint odor of stinky feet that probably only my super human nose can smell but they are still my favorite feet in the world and i love kissing them.
how the hungrier and/or tireder he is, the closer i need to be for him to play with toys. right before a nap, i usually just sit down right next to him. but if he is well rested and fed, i can leave him in his little play area to play and go about my business for a long time!
how he sits and rocks/bounces when he wants to go somewhere. oh, if only he figured out that he could get his move on. but until then, i'll let the crumbs in my kitchen sit a day longer and i won't have to worry about a stair gate...
ONE LAST LATE ENTRY - how mikey won't feed himself, he'll lean into what i'm trying to give him, but it has to be my hands that put the food in his mouth, not his. but he'll use the back of his wrist to make sure that what got put in stays in... killer. this couldn't be left off the list.

my list could go on and on. all of these examples were at the tip of my writing tongue just now. i didn't have to stop and think about any of them. i love being this boy's momma. it is a dream come true.

i wonder if my bath is going to be as fun as his was... probably not.

2011-06-27T19:55:00.002-06:00

today was a hard day for mikey. he's got 7 teeth that look like they could break through any day.[3 on the bottom & 4 across the top!] he fought naps. he cried miserable, painful cries. he looked at both of us like, "why? why can't you fix this?" he wasn't awful all day. but his low moments were pretty pathetic. [for the record, now that my hormones are back under control, i was fine...] we snuggled a lot. i tried real hard to just do whatever he wanted.

when it was time for him to get his tubby and get ready for bed, we were prepared to rush through it. but then garrett called me in for me to see how much fun he was having. so i sent him out to finish his dinner [we were eating in shifts, in order to accommodate a needy boy] while i sat with him. next thing we knew, garrett was recording the splashing. i don't know if you can see how low the water is. but we start his tubby out practically full.

here's a video of him playing in the tubby tonight. or as i like to think of it his happiest moments of the day:

and right now, he is in there screaming. if i didn't know there wasn't, i would think someone was in there pinching him. that's how pathetic his cries are. another half hour of this & i might be in the closet in the fetal position, rocking and sucking my thumb.

oh & in another totally unrelated matter. 2 workouts in one day. we did the jillian michaels 30 day shred dvd workout that i got last week from amazon for $7 this morning. i sweat like a banshee. then this afternoon, kimmy and i went for our walk. again, i sweat like a banshee. i'm kinda proud of myself. and garrett. [and kimmy.]

pizza-lovin-fly

2011-06-24T22:22:00.000-06:00

last night i made homemade pizza from scratch. turned out pretty tasty.

the love of my life.

this baby is pretty fly for a white guy.

staying & coming home

2011-06-23T21:06:00.000-06:00

i got emails, texts, and phone calls about my post yesterday. i am fine. yesterday was a hard day - i was not about to snap or anything. i never got cross with mikey. it was just a hard day emotionally for me. i had an agenda and so did he. and his cries were louder than mine. today, i didn't care about the house cleaning. or the little projects. i just sat down there and played with him. and held him. and snuggled him. and fed him. whenever & whatever he wanted. it worked for both of us. everyday can't be like that - but today could.

i know i am a lucky girl to have a husband say, "go out. have a break." but i wanted to spend my night with my boys. so we did. i appreciate that i could've had a break. but i wouldn't trade the night that i ended up having for anything. i could've gone out with friends for dinner & any other night, i would've loved it. but being home was the best place for me to be last night. garrett took over & it gave me a chance to sit back and just love on them.

thank you all for your support. it makes me feel loved to hear from so many people - but please do not worry about me. just know that in the last 48 hours, i've eaten way more junk than i should've.

tonight we watched so you think you can dance. i loved this dance. it made me cry. of course. [these two aren't even necessarily my favorite dancers...]

teething and hormones - a dangerous combo meal.

2011-06-22T15:59:00.000-06:00

today has been a hard day for me.

i'm hormonal.

mikey is teething and more high maintenance than normal. doesn't want to sit and play. wants to be held a lot. but at times even that isn't good enough.

2. i just finished off a whole row of cookies. with a glass of milk.

i cancelled my workout for afterschool. i told garrett he's taking me out to dinner and then we're coming home and watching a movie in bed. hopefully i will fall asleep while it is still light out.

3. i've been feeling frustrated all day. then i just looked over at mikey who is playing on the floor happily - for what feels like the first time today - and he smiled at me. one of his big adorable smiles. and i started to cry.

poor garrett, huh.

what i do

2011-06-16T13:25:00.003-06:00

in the last few months, i've had a few friends ask me, "what do you do all day?" the first time i was asked, i was immediately at a loss of words... at first i felt judged because i felt particularly frumpy that day & wondered if the person was sure i'd never heard of exercise before. but that's just my own issue, i know. i didn't know what i did, cause i didn't teach anymore. i didn't have productive answers like, "read with children, recess duty, lesson planning, disciplining 2nd graders, or teaching regrouping." i ended up pathetically defending myself with, "not much." i wasn't offended at being asked that. everyone that has asked me this doesn't have children. most are teachers. and i remember how busy teaching is. how by the time i went off track, i was usually so exhausted that it took me almost the whole 3 week break to finally have the energy to go back and face the demons. or students.

but that question got me thinking. i started formulating a list in my head. and i'm going to share that list.

mikey: i nurse. i hold. i puree. i feed. i comfort. i read. i play. i change. i diaper. i buy clothes. i wash clothes. i fold clothes. i organize clothes. i store clothes. i clean up spit up. i lotion eczema ridden skin. i worry. i listen. i photograph. i document.

me: i blog. i read. i facebook. i communicate with friends/family. i nap. i snack. i exercise. shut up - i'm trying.

my home: i clean. i tidy up. i do laundry. i grocery shop. i plan menus. i make smoothies.i cook dinners.

garrett: i engage in activities that i know he enjoys. i try to keep the romance alive. i will spare you details. i'm not just talking about s-e-x. we work at having a strong relationship. we laugh a lot. it keeps us both happy.

but still. sometimes i go to bed feeling like i had a very unproductive day. obviously, i don't do all of those things, every single day. but i try to do many of these things. i can see where - to an outsider - my life might seem unfulfilled. boring. but to me, it is anything but.

i was 29 when i got married. most of my friends got married in their early 20s. and by the time i had mikey, many of them were having their 3rd of 4th child. i have been in the same boat, wondering "what do you do?" hell, maybe i even asked this question out loud. i spent so much time thinking that i was going to be single forever and that i would never get to what i wanted most in the world - to have kids, that i consider my simple little life that i have now to be one of the greatest blessings ever. it is part of a bigger picture, being married to my best friend, a better person than i ever dreamed of, and having his children... but it is everything i ever wanted.

then, this last weekend, someone said to me, "do you miss teaching? do you miss that validation?" she's a housewife. has been a mom since her early 20's. she knows motherhood isn't glamourous. she knows that poop stinks. and i could easily respond to her, "i miss my friends and i miss my students. but i don't miss the work of teaching. i love being home with mikey." cause i don't and i do. i loved it & i'm so glad i had the 9 year experience that i did... but if i never teach in a classroom as a paid district employee again, i won't be sad. i don't need the validation of being a teacher.

i guess it just comes down to where we are in life. my friends without kids wonder what i do. my friends with kids wonder if i miss being a teacher. the bottom line is i know that i'm in the best place i can be. home, on the floor, playing games with my baby. reading books to him. helping him learn and grow. smiling and laughing with him. holding him when he needs to be comforted. maybe i don't get paid in money for what i am doing, but claps and smiles and drool are a more fulfilling paycheck to me.

the point of this blog post was not for me to say i was offended by questions asked, i wasn't. it was a place for me to organize my thoughts and feelings. so that the next time someone asks me, i don't have to make self deprecating excuses. i can honestly, cheerfully say, "i take care of my son." i realize that it might take someone who has kids to understand the simplicity and complexity of it... i hope they have the chance someday.

the many faces of mikey yelling

2011-06-15T16:33:00.000-06:00

apparently, he might have my temper. uh oh. don't make this kid mad or you might get a talking to.

there's a video about it here.

pool time!

2011-06-14T13:45:00.001-06:00

playing at the pool. visit our youtube channel for more videos.

the sleeps

2011-06-10T21:19:00.000-06:00

so... mikey goes to bed without crying most of the time now. here's a little confession: i nursed him to sleep and handed him to garrett who would go put him down up until a few weeks ago. but he did it great and why mess with something that works? i don't care what the books said, i liked it. lately, he's tired but not asleep and instead of letting him sit there til he nurses himself to sleep, we started putting him to bed. he figured it out. sure, there were a few nights where he cried for an hour. but now, he usually cries for about 5 minutes or less and is out.

here's another confession. up until two weeks ago, he'd really only nap in his swing or on me or in the car. i know, i know, i'm a horrible mom. so horrible i let my baby sleep on me. but all too often when i put him in his crib, he'd cry. and i forgot that i could just let him cry about it and figure it out, so i'd get him. we made it work. sometimes his naps got cut short cause i really had to pee... but we both survived. finally, i had garrett take down the swing so i couldn't give in and wimp out. the first day, he cried for over an hour during his morning nap and didn't sleep at that time. he didn't cry too long for his afternoon nap that day... and since then... barely a cry. sometimes some wimpers. sometimes he gets mad when i put him down and he lets me know it - but he's sleeping for 2-3 hours at a time now.

it is fabulous. why didn't i figure this out before? not going to lie though - some days i really miss him while he's sleeping the morning or afternoon away. and i'm glad he's adjusted so well so quickly... cause when he does cry - it puts me on edge. i really like that kiddo. and the mom who i thought i was going to be - the kinda mom that says, "i can handle that baby crying" - well, she doesn't really exist. your baby can cry all day & it wouldn't stress me out one bit. but mine? goodness... no thank you.

check out the drool

2011-06-07T13:09:00.002-06:00

"what, like you've never drooled before?" is what those eyes are saying to me. [mikey, i have - don't worry.]

timelines

2011-05-30T22:13:00.001-06:00

i have lived in utah for 10 years now. [i never thought i'd end up here. but i'm pretty sure i won't be moving anytime soon. and i'm ok with that. teenage hayley would not have agreed.]

i have lived in my house for almost 7 years. [when i moved in, i couldn't imagine outgrowing this place. when we move out, it will be to a much needed upgrade.]

i have been a wife for over 2 years [time flies when you're having fun, right? honestly - marriage is better than i envisioned, before i met garrett of course.]

i quit teaching almost a year ago. [9 years is a long time to do something and then quit cold turkey. i miss it - my friends, the kids - but not the work. no, i'm not going back. i would if we needed me to, but we don't so i'm not.]

i have been a mom for almost 9 months. [more nervous than i expected of myself, but it is even better than i expected it to be, too.]

i am happier than i dreamed of 10 years ago. i'm chubbier than i dreamed of, too. oh well. happiness trumps chubbiness. [but still - i'm working on the chubbs.]

growing up

2011-05-27T08:45:00.002-06:00

last night garrett and i had a little "come to jesus" talk about a few things. no, we have not been fighting. no, we are not struggling with getting along.

it was more about how we're living our life. planning for the future. how we sometimes don't act like adults about certain things. both of us are still sometimes caught in the ol' singles days habits.

we want to do better. as garrett put it - we need to grow up. we're parents now. we need to stop being compulsive about silly things and make responsible decisions.

i am going to do better. i'm going to try so hard to stop being lazy about the things that i am being lazy about. i've been really good about talking big... but putting those things into action. not so much. when i quit working, almost a year ago, i made a list of daily "chores" that i would do throughout the week. sadly, i'm confessing here that i have never once followed the list. sure the jobs get done most weeks eventually. but i've been very undisciplined. maybe i need to revamp that list. i don't know. but i want to start doing this simple little thing. i used to [tooting of my own self horn here] be an amazingly, productive teacher. i met deadlines, i succeeded. i just need to find my homemaking groove.

in our talk, we decided to make some cut backs. because we're trying to be more grown up. do we need a dvr? not during the summer. so, we're going to get rid of it for the summer and see how we feel about it in the fall. we might be over our shows. we might be done with letting the tv rule our evenings. i kinda hope so. besides saving money, i know this is going to lead us to a more productive, healthy lifestyle. do we need jumbo cell phone plans? no. do we need netflix? yes. because we have a very basic plan already and we don't want to go into depression and deprivation. do we need 2 cars? maybe not.

we have two houses. if we ever want to be able to put a down payment on another house after we sell a few of the ones we have - we need to just be better.

the biggest thing we are planning on doing: stop eating out. i'm a big fat lazy butt way too often. even if it means we resort to a frozen pizza, we will not be frequenting the in n out anymore. i might cry sometimes, but i will survive.

so garrett, i shared these thoughts because i want to have it written down. so if we start to slip up or indulge again, we can look back and remember some of the things we're feeling right now. i pledge to do better. for you, for mikey, for our future.

things making me smile today:

2011-05-16T19:53:00.001-06:00

1. garrett put together a collage of some of our favorite pictures from our photo shoot at easter with my ever so talented, photographer sister . i love looking up at those pictures with my adorable baby boy.

2. a toothbrush for my baby who is sporting a couple of teeth down on the bottom row.

3. this pack of sunscreen at costco - which if you use a coupon for, you can get for about $10. which is awesome because one of those spray bottles alone is typically $8. and i don't want my baby boy getting a sunburn on my watch. [if you don't have a baby, you can get non baby packs, too... still a fantastic savings!]

4. i got myself this new recipe binder. it has some fun organizers & i have finally got my recipes organized in a manner that doesn't drive me crazy. it comes with some sheet protectors, and i've added some of my own. i taped recipes in if they weren't full page. i learned the trick of having recipes in sheet protectors from heather a long time ago... that way if things splatter, no big deal.

things not making me so thrilled today:

1. waking up with pink eye. i don't know where i caught it. i'm sorry if i exposed anyone.
2. mikey screaming himself to "sleep" right now. i wanna suck my thumb and rock in a fetal position.
3. how far behind i am on project life for mikey. i have pictures printed. i have the journaling done, i just need to copy off the blog and put on the journaling cards. it takes a long time. but i really want to get 'er done.
4. eye drops. i really am a freak. i can't stand to have them put in. yes, i can't put them in myself. garrett has to do it for me. and i fight and whine. spaz!

8 months o' goodness

2011-05-14T17:04:00.000-06:00

the center picture is the winner. the smaller surrounding pictures are the outtakes. sometimes i think the outtakes are just as fun as the winner. we like this baby. that is for sure.

my first mother's day

2011-05-09T12:03:00.000-06:00

garrett got up and made me chocolate chip pancakes and bacon. and served it to me with a new charm from james avery. it is a charm i've always wanted. he totally surprised me, too. it made me cry. we went to church & when we got home, garrett made lunch. we lazed the afternoon away with napping, playing and me playing with my new cookbooks and recipe organizer. then i whipped up my food for dinner with garrett's family. we went over to his parents' house to celebrate mother's day & family night. when we got home, we put mikey to bed and settled in to watch some tv together. when i was craving a treat, garrett made some killer nachos. i don't know how many times i heard, "can i do anything for you?" yesterday. it was a very special day and i will remember it always. with garrett - every day is special, though. he spoiled me and took care of me yesterday, but he does everyday. i felt honored, but i do everyday. and i wouldn't have it any other way.

i did enjoy snuggling my baby yesterday. i enjoyed changing diapers. i enjoyed calming a tired, fusser. i enjoyed getting him up from his nap, when his smile is just so big. i enjoyed every minute of it. i am so glad i'm a mom. it is a blessing. it is a treat. i love my baby. i love my husband. i love my family.

thank you, garrett. for loving me. for making me a mom.

it is finally here...

2011-05-05T18:32:00.000-06:00

we've known it was coming for a while. this poor baby has had a runny nose for a month. at his 6 month check up, the doctor said it looked like his gums were ready for it any day. that was almost 2 months ago. he's always been a drooly little feller. on sunday, i could see the two bottom front teeth in his gums. but today, one pooped through the skin. i thought i saw it earlier and garrett kinda dismissed it. then tonight he was holding him and said, "it is out!" and i wanted to punch him in the face a little. [kidding, mostly.]

he is still pretty happy. he's been a little uncomfortable, he wants to be held more than normal. his cheeks have been super rosy, he's been fighting a little fever. but he's a trooper. just don't ask him [or me] to ride in a car for longer than 20 minutes.

the staredown

2011-05-03T16:18:00.000-06:00

i love how he's staring me down while keeping an eye on the flip camera. this kid has a certain intensity today.

i don't really want another name for piss quivers.

2011-04-27T15:45:00.000-06:00

will ferrell is funny. i can't think of one thing he's done that doesn't make me laugh.

this is my first real mother's day. i mean, last year i was pregnant, but the kid wasn't out yet, so it wasn't really real. is it wrong that i plan on celebrating it up? is it also wrong that i've ordered myself a few things?

target has this new [to me at the very least] red card that you can get 5% off every purchase. all you do is bring in a blank check & they link up with your bank and send you a card. you use it on any and every purchase at target & save. i got one today.

garrett just said some of the funniest things to me. i laughed so hard. it made me super slap happy.

and random.

i have to go back to target today to get a few things. i'll only share one item on that list. cause the rest are too personal. nail polish remover. cause i found an empty container under my sink today. made me a little grouchy.

mikey has been sitting and playing all by himself and making happy noises for 40 minutes. except for when garrett made me laugh out loud, he hasn't turned around to look at me. i've sat for moments at a time and just watched, smiled and enjoyed. i feel like i've been spying. that kid makes me so happy.

i have been drinking milk like crazy today. the thirst can not be quenched.

i keep singing "mother knows best" from tangled to mikey. and then i realize that mother was wicked & hope that mikey doesn't some day think i'm wicked.

i learned today that i really don't know nursery rhymes. i'm kinda a sucky mom. i got a few nursery rhyme books at the library and will be practicing after mikey's bedtime tonight.

i really really want to open my "mother's day" present that got delivered today. i never should've given it that nickname. darn.

a few notes to self:

2011-04-20T17:32:00.000-06:00

don't cute ALL of your fingernails just a little too short. makes everything just a little painful.
keep being a good girl - your wedding ring and diamond finally fit again. at the same time.
when you walk around for 24 hours straight with a tissue shoved up your nose, one nostril will get bigger. but only the one.
reading a book about a kid who has a pretty close relationship with his teacher is fun. even funnier when you've been a teacher. am very glad that i bought this for $2.99 for the ipad/nook app.
in fact - always listen to megan on book suggestions. she's never led you astray.
chocolate chip pancakes are good - but you probably shouldn't have them more than twice a week.
don't piss off talented friends. [see below.]
must try chicken tortilla pie soon. mhmmm.

it really helps to have talented friends:

2011-04-20T16:08:00.001-06:00

my sister got me 2 "m" onesies when mikey was born. his last one is long sleeved and is the size that he's currently more than half way through poundage wise. basically - its days are numbered. i have love love loved his "m" onesies. and i bought 2 tie onesies for mikey when he was a wee little babe. but he grew out of those by the time he was 4 months old. i've been missing them... my friend beth made some for finn & blogged about it. i decided that i needed to take advantage of her skills. last week we went fabric shopping. and then we got some onesies. today she presented me with these treasures:

is it just me or does anyone else smell an etsy shop in the making for beth? i think these are adorable. thank you so much, beth. i can't wait for him to wear them! in fact, i think he'll wear one of the ties for easter, even if it is a little big right now. just another reason to add to my list of "i'm glad we're friends!"

7 months!

2011-04-11T19:35:00.001-06:00

outtakes:

winner:

darn it. he's cute.

six ell-bees!

2011-04-11T14:01:00.000-06:00

i lost 6 pounds on weight watchers last week. i know it was the first week, but i don't care - i'm thrilled. already, i can feel my clothes fitting better. i exercised 4 times last week, too. the ipad is a beautiful thing - we're netflixing movies while we walk. garrett lost 9.7 pounds - also amazing. for weight watchers, last night we took more measurements of our bodies. we're both already losing inches. this is great.

here's what i'm thinking about the whole weight loss/health situation:

i refuse to diet for the rest of my life. i will do weight watchers for the next 3 months. i will see where my body is at the end of those 3 months and hopefully like where i am. during these 3 months, i'd like to form healthier eating habits. and stick to them.
i will try to exercise about 5 times a week. currently my goal is to get in my workout in between mikey's morning feedings. usually he'll go back to bed for a couple more hours... perfect time for me to exercise and shower.

i don't need to be a size 6 again. but i need to be healthier. i need to stop loathing what i see when i look in the mirror. i need to be able to fit into the clothes that i own. most importantly: i need to be an example to my son. i can't expect him to eat healthy and be active if i'm not. i really do look forward to when spring shows up and sticks around. i plan on many, many walks with my little man.

i'm treating the next 3 months as a way to get to where i should be. i'm not crash dieting, i'm not starving - hells bells, i'm a nursing mom. but i am eating better. less of some, more of others. i went to the grocery store this morning and bought so much produce. at one point, i looked in my shopping cart and smiled. i couldn't believe that i was willingly buying kale, broccoli, sweet potatoes, spinach, bananas, apples, pears, and much more. just for shits and giggles, i threw in some weight watchers ice cream - cause i know me. the cravings will hit at some point. maybe not today, but probably this week.

i can drop these 30 pounds, one green smoothie at a time. mile by mile. or as i like to think of it - movie by movie in the wee hours of the morning. also, i'm going to track my weight loss on the side of my blog. cause i like seeing progress.

afternoon fun. for me.

2011-04-06T15:59:00.000-06:00

heaven help me. i might eat him up.

more weekly meal plans

2011-04-04T15:05:00.000-06:00

monday - fend night (garrett will eat leftovers) because i've got bookclub.
tuesday - cayenne chicken with avocado salsa, salad.
wednesday - black bean & couscous salad, roasted brussel sprouts.
thursday - baked creamy chicken taquitos, salad
friday - beef and bean chili (weight watchers recipe)
saturday - cajun barbeque rub for pork tenderloin (ww, again)
sunday - ward family night, so who knows.

have i mentioned that i use this meal planner/grocery shopping list? i'm pretty sure i got it from Liz.

last week a few items didn't get made, so they're making their appearances this week.

this afternoon, i was talking to my friend kristin on gmail. she gave me some encouraging advice about exercising... so now i've got a new goal: exercise every morning after mikey goes back to bed. then shower. so that when he wakes up again for real, for the day - i'm ready to go. cause mikey wakes up sometime between 5-7 and eats, but then always goes back to bed until between 8 - 9. so... i'm doing it. my goal is to get in 3 miles and then shower. no more jumping back into bed for me!

i want progress. i'm feeling motivated.

weekend update o' fatness

2011-04-03T21:24:00.001-06:00

turns out - mikey has hand, foot and mouth disease. i knew it wasn't just a heat rash. when he started throwing up on thursday, i called garrett in a panic. took him to the dr that afternoon, and he was diagnosed. apparently he has/had about 10 sores in his throat. which would explain the wierd face he'd been making for a few days. i think it was his throat hurting... the dr said he was in a lot of pain, that we needed to be patient with him. patience hasn't been a problem though. through all of this - mikey has been pretty wonderful. maybe a little more needy - wanting to be held at times instead of put down with toys, but not super fussy. you can tell he's not feeling great, but he's a trooper. sure, we've indulged him and held him, but really - when don't we?

garrett did a huge project for me on saturday. he took the love sac that was in our living room over to store at his parents & bought, built and organized mikey's toy corner for me. it was a little vision that i'd been brewing up in my head. i'm thrilled with it all. then today, my mom called and said that she thought the shelves were on sale now at target... so as soon as i can, i'm going to get a price adjustment. garrett worked all during conference on saturday, ran errands in between the sessions. he also cleaned/sanitized all of mikey's toys, which was necessary because of the coxsackie.

garrett got an iPad. he's in love. i'm in love. mikey's in love. here's a video of him enjoying the new little piano we downloaded. plus, the screen/camera is even bigger for him to sit and look at himself in. we got the iPad for a few reasons... to facetime when garrett travels, for an e-reader, as a portable movie player for the little dude eventually. but mainly - garrett got a bonus & he wanted it & i guess we all now i love a new toy.

as of tomorrow morning - i'm going to be tracking what i eat with weight watchers again. i am getting too large. i need to stop talking about changing things & put my words into actions. it is sad to me that i keep deleting pictures of me and mikey or me and garrett because of my double chin. this is an important time of life & i can't afford to spend more time ashamed of how i look.

why is it that i barely leave the house & am usually just fine with that. but the second you tell me that my baby and i should be quarantined because we could expose any & everyone to a very contagious virus - i'm dying to get out of the house? waking up to snow this morning really squashed my plans of going for a big long walk at lunch time.

a happy sick boy & dinner pictures

2011-03-29T21:22:00.001-06:00

mikey will stop fussing or squawking anytime i turn my camera on my phone on & let him look at himself. i adore it. he does too, clearly. is he vain or what? [p.s. you should check out his youtube channel... new video with him looking at himself in the mirror.] today, we had quite the wait at the dr's office. yes, i took him to have his ears checked. yes, i realize i'm a paranoid mom. but he has a rash & a fever.

monday's dinner: homemade chicken cordon bleu, roasted asparagus and a caesar salad.

tonight's dinner: spinach & strawberry salad with a homemade vinaigrette dressing, creamy chicken & bacon pastry puffs. heaven on earth. we're having those leftovers for lunch tomorrow. i can't wait.

recently, my dad has given me a little grief about how much cooking garrett does around here. and believe me, i know how much garrett does around here. i do. i appreciate. i do. but i got a tidge defensive when my dad was teasing me. it made me realize that if i'm sensitive about it, it is probably partially true. maybe i do feel a little guilty about the amount of my work that garrett has done in the last 6 months. so this week, i'm stepping up my game plan. no frozen meals so far. even homemade salad dressing tonight.

those pastry thingys - you need to give them a whirl. divine.

so, take that dad. i aint afraid of no kitchen.

this week's menu:

2011-03-28T16:03:00.001-06:00

i do much better with eating when i menu plan. if i have menus planned, i don't opt for going out to eat at night.

here's what i've got planned for the week:

monday - homemade chicken cordon bleu, caesar salad, roasted asparagus
tuesday - creamy chicken & bacon pastry pockets, canned corn, spinach salad
wednesday - teriyaki chicken with rice, sushi (from costco), salad
thursday - baked potatoes & fixin's, salad, carrots
friday - pineapple bacon burgers, oven roasted balsamic brussel sprouts
saturday - grilled chicken, black bean & couscous salad

notice i avoided putting any desserts on my menu. i'm hoping if i don't put it on the menu, i'll forget about it. we'll see.

monster jammies make my world go round

2011-03-27T09:45:00.000-06:00

garrett had a business trip to austin last week. i am so jealous that he gets to see heather and her kiddies so often now. one of these trips, mikey & i are going with him.
i still hate being away from him. we're joined at the hip & i wouldn't have it any other way.
i went on my first trip with mikey. alone. to holly's in st. george. we had a grand time. my mom also came to town. connor and will loved mikey. he loved them. now mikey is getting a little cold. slight fever. runny nose. a little congestion. still smiley. just extra tired.
yesterday, shawnie was driving through town and we met her and her boys for lunch. i love that girl so much, so thankful she was one of my roommates freshman year.
last night, we met megan and cory for dinner and then went to the provo library for an evening with markus zusak, the author of one of my all time favorite books, the book thief. [if you haven't read it yet, you clearly don't love me. and something is definitely wrong with you.] he was charming and witty, and i could've sat and listened to his australian accent forever. thank you, thank you, thank you megan. another one of my favorite people - another one of my roommates from freshman year.
i really lucked out with roommates @ ricks.
friday night, i got some new nail polishes. i painted my nails. it is all part of my start-looking-better- program. next week, i'm going to get serious about a gym membership. i also got a cute new shirt at costco. i'm going to try to fancy up my style just a tidge. i always wear very plain shirts and jeans. not super femme. at holly's this week, i was impressed on how cute she looked just for going to target. part of my problem is that i literally have 4 shirts that fit that aren't stained right now. so. aside from doing a lot of laundry, my choices are limited. i'll never be super fancy like hojo, but i can jazz it up a little.
i'm reading pioneer woman's book. i'm enjoying it. she's funny. i love the heat in that book.
i decided to corner round project life. getting caught up was in itself a little project. but i'm sooooo glad i did it.
i woke up this morning with body aches and a headache. i'm skipping church because mikey is still sleeping and it is half way through our first hour. i feel that when your baby is sick, you shouldn't wake him up. even for church. we're both having a relaxing day. i am pretty sure we won't regret it.
my dad got home from moscow. thank heavens, no injuries this time. i like having him on american soil.
today is my punky's birthday. my niece. she's 8 now. i can't believe it. through the thick and thin of the last decade, she's always been nothing but a source of pure joy for me. when i was down, all i had to do was be around her and all of my problems just slipped right away. when she was a baby & someone knocked on their doorbell, she shook in anticipation that it might be me. nowadays, we mostly do special sleepovers... i still just love her.

listen to the bib!

2011-03-17T10:36:00.001-06:00

even though he's not Irish, we're kissing him!

6 month outtakes & the winner

2011-03-12T12:43:00.002-07:00

fauxhawks...

2011-03-11T11:40:00.000-07:00

have they ever been cuter?

cafe rio dare

2011-03-09T15:30:00.000-07:00

this is my cafe rio order. i dare you to share yours. let me know if you do.

chicken salad a la hayley:

black beans. i used to say, "no beans, just rice please." but i'm trying to eat more beans.
shredded chicken, unless i have a FREE MEAL, then i get the grilled chicken.
shredded lettuce. way easier to eat than the huge regular lettuce bits.
no pico.
guac on the side. i give it to garrett, cause i love him, of course. normally, i love guac - but for some reason not on my salad.
no cilantro.
cotija cheese, please.
chips please.
creamy tomatillo dressing. if they didn't charge, i'd get 2 dressings. but they do, so i don't. rude.

and that sums up a meal made in heaven. i guess you can guess where we lunched today. go on, share how you take yours!

celebrations and exhanges

2011-03-09T09:43:00.000-07:00

i had a wonderful birthday. family and friends spoiled me, made me feel special. garrett gave me his upgrade at verizon and let me get an iPhone... loving that thing! i had an iPod Touch and have always though that was fantastic... the phone just makes it better. and FaceTime - what is cooler? nothing. the best present of all? my life. my wonderful husband, my adorable baby - getting to do what i get to do.

for my birthday, my mom gave me a charm from James Avery. she bought it in december when she was in texas, so the charm had sat in a bag in a box for a few months. when i opened it, it was tarnished. silver tarnishes, i know, but i contacted James Avery because I think presents should be untarnished. i called their customer support line, hoping they'd offer to exchange or clean it or something. the lady i spoke with said that the only option for me was to purchase their cleaning supplies. that made me mad. so i sent a disappointed email to their customer service. i mean, anyone who has a charm bracelet has invested money into that thing - they aren't cheap. i don't think it is too much to ask for for the company to take care of their customers. i was pleased to recieve an email back that afternoon offering to send me their cleaning kit and an apology for the rude lady on the phone. i liked that. i also don't think a $20 care kit is too much to ask for when you calculate the hundreds and hundreds of dollars put into my bracelet. side note: in the meantime, garrett had asked if he could try something to fix the charm. he used a little tooth paste & it worked like a charm. ha. get it? so many reasons to keep that kid around.

next up in my adventurous life: my pump stopped working on saturday night mid pump. yes, i'm a nerd & i pump milk for mikey's cereal. one time, i'd tried just using water because i didn't have milk pumped, and he turned his nose up at it. so i was really disappointed when my pump stopped working. i told my mom about it & she, of course, said, "oh, take that back." i didn't think i could because i didn't buy it, it was given to me, it was used and i didn't have a receipt. i grew up with a mom who would take anything back and it was intimidating to me to think of walking into target and giving them something used back and getting a brand new one. so i asked garrett if he'd call target and see what their policy was. they said they'd exhange it and then i asked him to do it for me right then and there. he did. [again, so many reasons. i love him for being willing to take a breast pump in and exhange it for me.] what is even better - they no longer have in stock my single pump, so garrett came home with an upgraded double pump... nice!

sunday morning, i was blow drying my hair for church when in the mirror all of a sudden i see a spark of fire. flying directly at my head. i brushed it out of my hair and watched it fall to the ground. it scared the kajeebers out of me, to say the least. turned off that blow dryer and went to church with 75% dried hair. i have since ordered an orange blowdryer on amazon and that bad boy should arrive today. yippee!

over the weekend, we also made a wii game purchase. i'm sure some people might find it funny that for my birthday, i wanted the goldeneye 007 wii game. i know many women would probably have no interest in it, but back in college i ruled at that game. played all of the time with krystal and joe. when i sent joe a text this weekend inviting him and his wife over sometime to play, he said he was scared because i used to kick his butt. and i did. i've made my peace with the fact that garrett is better at everything than i am. when we play against each other, it is pretty evenly split who wins. i'm getting better at it now, garrett and i both play in our "free time." like right now, mikey just went down for a nap. am i going to jump in the shower? nope i'm going to wrap up this post and go shoot people. or maybe it makes perfect sense to some that i like this game so much.

thanks everyone for the birthday wishes, it was a great day, or week. i had a few meals with friends in celebration which was fun. i received emails, messages, texts and phone calls - all making me feel special. nothing beats kisses from my boys though.