note to self: when you're feeling fat and frumpy, a hair cut doesn't fix the problem.
lately i've been feeling frumpy. and i know it is all my fault - i'm not trying to blame anyone here. i'm just venting. i know it is my fault for not taking the time and putting forth the effort to get dressed everyday. i know it is my fault for putting all of the food into my mouth & not losing weight.
i could argue here that things are difficult with the getting dressed because of our tiny little house and my husband working from home and how sometimes it is just impossible to space out work calls, blow dryers, napping baby and treadmill time. but i won't. if i really wanted to, i'd make it happen. but it is hard. in my defense.
i was growing out my hair. i don't know why, just for shits and giggles. probably the biggest reason why: i hadn't gotten a hair cut since before mikey was born. i got my bangs trimmed right before he was born and then again about 6 weeks after he was born. and then nothing since.
garrett was due for a hair cut & i've finally convinced him to go to my girl. costs more, but better haircuts are worth it, we've decided. so i thought, "maybe a haircut will help fix some of my frump."
wrong. wrong. wrong. now, it is just shorter. and harder to just throw up in a pony tail. and i have bangs again. so i'm going to have to go through that stage of growing 'em out again. at some point. drat. i love the girl that does my hair, she's hilarious & all... but sometimes i don't feel like she listens. she doesn't always do what i tell her i want her to do. you know? i kinda feel like i've always got some variation of the same style.
this just wasn't what i needed for the frump factor this week. especially since i've got crazy a dry patches of skin all over my face. and my face is super round. and i'm sick.
there was this old lady that used to teach at my school. she was senile. should've retired from teaching about 10 years before she did. she was one of those people who would ALWAYS tell me i looked sick or tired. you know, she meant well, but still. it is rude to tell people that they look sick/tired. a couple of weeks ago, i was bored on a friday afternoon, so i went to visit kimmy. just so happens, this old lady was also there that day, too - visiting people. kimmy and i were laughing because i hid from running into this lady in her room. cause i said, "my self esteem just can't handle a joanne comment."
anyway. venting over. my hair is ugly. i'm squeezing into my clothes still. i'm frustrated with myself in so many ways. i'm really sick of being sick and not being able to take anything. i don't love the fact that all i want to do is go finish off a pan of brownies right now. doesn't help the situation.
thank heavens that my husband tells me i'm pretty everyday, even when i haven't shower, i've got tissues stuffed up my nose, my bangs are in greasy clumps and all i do is groan. i'm a real treat for him, yeah! [i put on a little makeup in the afternoon yesterday, i was trying to class it up for him. but he still made dinner.] and luckily, mikey still grins a whole body grin when he sees me. at least my 2 crazy boys love me. cause lately they're the only people who could possibly get excited to see my ugly mug.